Ted
Cruz stopped Trump in Texas. Then the plan is if they get to the convention,
they're going to have Dr. Ben Carson sew all their bodies together to form one
enormous super-candidate who just might have enough delegates to win. –Jimmy
Kimmel
President
Obama seems like he's enjoying this whole thing. He spoke at a fundraiser in
Dallas where he took a moment to ruminate about Donald Trump-brand wine. I
think Obama's in his "I only have 10 months left so to hell with it"
phase. Maybe he'll host the Oscars next year. –Jimmy Kimmel
The
big story of the day, bigger than politics, bigger than sports, bigger than
anything, was "The Bachelor." The only good thing about Daylight
Savings Time is we didn't have to wait another hour to find out who Ben chose.
–Jimmy Kimmel
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