idiocracy23: September 2022

Friday, September 30, 2022

INVESTIGATION: What The Hell Happened To Nordstream Pipeline? | Breaking Points

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Russell Brand: Corruption: This Is A F*cking JOKE

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

NBA 2K: Indiana Pacers vs Los Angeles Lakers (Overtime-Buzzer Beater)

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic.

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

In the space where he had to state the reason for his divorce, he wrote ‘I am married to Marjorie Taylor Greene.’ (Cheers!)

September 2022

“Ginni Thomas, the wife of the supreme court justice Clarence Thomas, appeared before the January 6 committee this week to face questions for unhinged, conspiracy-laden texts sent to Trump’s chief of staff urging him to dispute the 2020 election results. I’m not legal expert, but I feel like if you’re the spouse of a sitting supreme court justice, you shouldn’t be texting anyone in the government about anything, let alone a coup. Thomas was not only texting Trump’s chief of staff, Mark Meadows, but also had direct communication with state lawmakers, pressuring them to overturn Biden’s victory. She was also texting some truly batshit conspiracy theories from the craziest corners of the internet, such as her belief that the ‘Biden crime family’ would be arrested and sent to live on barges off Gitmo. Here’s my question: why a barge off Gitmo instead of just Gitmo itself? Why a barge off the prison? Have they ever done that with any other criminal suspect ever?” —Seth Meyers

“We are celebrating a milestone from the New York Yankees star Aaron Judge. The outfielder hit his 61st home run of the season on Wednesday, tying the single-season American League record set by Roger Maris in 1961. The Yankees star has seven more games to break Maris’s milestone, though he’s unlikely to break the major league record of 73, set by Barry Bonds in 2001 under the cloud of doping. The difference though is that unlike Barry Bonds, Aaron Judge can still fit his head through the neckhole of his sweaters.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“One of Trump’s most loyal Maga maggots, Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene and her husband of 27 years, Harry Greene, has filed for divorce. His original sentence was 30 years, but the judge shaved three years off for good behavior. In the space where he had to state the reason for his divorce, he wrote ‘I am married to Marjorie Taylor Greene.’” —Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Those flamingoes are clearly doing coke in there (because nothing projects ‘winner’ like a Confederate soldier in Pennsylvania)

September 2022

“Our hearts go out to the people of Florida right now after Hurricane Ian barreled into the state with record winds, rainfall and a storm surge of 18 feet. But there was still humor to be found. At one botanical garden in St Petersburg, a bunch of flamingoes huddled in the public bathroom to ride out the storm. Really? They all just went to the bathroom at the same time? Those flamingoes are clearly doing coke in there.” —Stephen Colbert

“And some Floridians have even found catfish in their front yards. To make matters worse, they were nowhere near as hot as their profile picture.” —Stephen Colbert

“We checked on the governor’s race in Pennsylvania, where Republican nominee and Trump devotee Doug Mastriano is struggling in the polls, in part because, according to political scientists, he suuuuucks. Among the ways: Mastriano attended the January 6th riot at the Capitol, has associations with Christian nationalists, proposed charging women who violated an abortion ban with murder, is connected to a social media site run by a known antisemite, and was photographed wearing a Confederate uniform. Because historically, nothing projects ‘winner’ like a Confederate soldier in Pennsylvania.” —Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

The Kinks - Apeman 1970

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Nirvana - All Apologies (MTV Unplugged)

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Foghorn Stringband "I'd Jump the Mississippi" Live at KDHX 2/14/13

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Resurrection Ertugrul Season 1 Episode 7

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Keisa Brown "The Dance Man"

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

THE GROOVE MERCHANTS "There's Got To Be Someone For Me"

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Bobby McClure "Peak Of Love"

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

the black angels - no satisfaction

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

The Chrome Cranks - dead man's suit

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Thursday, September 29, 2022

Is that a good idea, giving President Bush more syllables to pronounce? (That's what unions are for)

"President Bush is the fittest president in history. They said it's because he spends a lot of time exercising. See a lot of our previous presidents wasted that time reading." --Jay Leno

"President Bush believes Rafael Palmeiro. He said he considers Palmeiro a friend and tests or no tests, he believes him. Maybe Rafael Palmeiro is the one who told him there were weapons of mass destruction." --Jimmy Kimmel, on whether Palmeiro used steroids

"The White House has changed their slogan from the war on terror to the global struggle against violent extremism. Well that just rolls off the tongue. Is that a good idea, giving President Bush more syllables to pronounce?" --Jay Leno

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Miami Dolphins vs. Cincinnati Bengals | Week 4 2022 Game Highlights

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

GAS LEAK THEORY: Who Sabotaged Russia's Nord Stream Pipelines? The Most Likely Suspect Revealed

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Jimmy Dore: No, Russia Didn’t Blow Up Their Own Pipeline

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

MLB The Show: Indianapolis vs Albuquerque Isotopes (John Hulse pitches 1 Hitter/14 Ks)

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic.

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

It's because you are here to help create a new one (Number 343)

September 2022

“Excerpts from a new book on the Trump presidency from the New York Times reporter Maggie Haberman are being leaked. According to Confidence Man, Trump was having dinner with Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer when he turned to their non-white staffers and said ‘why don’t you get the food?’ That is just awful, but to be fair, that’s what he says in every situation.” —Stephen Colbert

“Haberman also revealed that Trump nearly fired his daughter Ivanka and her husband, Jared Kushner, via tweet. That would be an awful way to find out they lost their jobs as … handbag blondeface? Haunted scarecrow? His and hers towel racks? I don’t know what they did. In the end, the ex-president did what he has done his whole life: he avoided his children. He never fired them, and as we all know, Jared went on to achieve Middle East peace.” —Stephen Colbert

“A new Forbes 400 list listed Elon Musk as the richest man in America, with a net worth of $251 Billion. The Tesla CEO beat out Jeff Bezos, who ceded his spot at No 1 in a show of solidarity with employees who aren’t allowed to go No 1 on the job. Trump is also back on the list, coming in at No 343, which hopefully will soon be his inmate number as well.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“There is a report in Maggie Haberman’s book that the former Trump chief of staff John Kelly convinced him not to fire Jared and Ivanka via tweet by waving a KFC drumstick in front of him and tossing it across the room. According to this book, everyone who worked at the White House, including his family, thought Trump was a dangerous, unpredictable child. And on behalf of all of us, I just want to say thank you to those brave men and women who kept that information to themselves and away from the American people who could have removed him from office.” —Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Like when someone wears a long-sleeve shirt to wrestle a gator (Why Not Us?)

September 2022

“As we speak, Hurricane Ian is slamming into Florida, and I honestly hope that everyone in the Sunshine state is staying safe. Like I mean, rest of America safe, not like Florida safe, you know? Like when someone wears a long-sleeve shirt to wrestle a gator.” —Trevor Noah

“Just be safe safe. Because I know you guys are brave, but this hurricane – I mean, you heard Governor DeSantis, he said, ‘this thing is the real deal’. Not like the usual stuff I tell you to be scared of, like drag queens or critical race theory. I’m talking real! Like I might fly myself to Martha’s Vineyard.’” —Trevor Noah

“The devastating category 4 storm that hit Florida overnight Wednesday included sustained winds of over 150mph, with a storm surge of 18 feet. This shit is wild! But I also had to wonder: why do we still name natural disasters? It’s a weird thing we do. We don’t do that with personal disasters. There’s no doctor who’s ever been like ‘I have some bad news … Jeremy has spread to your brain.’” —Trevor Noah

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

The World's Largest Arms-Producing Companies (right before he slips out of his handcuffs)

September 2022

“There are several major questions for the House January 6th committee, including whether to subpoena Donald Trump himself. I gotta be honest, if I was on the committee, I’m not sure where I would land on the question of whether to subpoena Trump. I mean, on the one hand it would be great to get him under oath on camera, so you could make him answer questions in front of the public under the threat of perjury. On the other hand, he’s not going to answer questions under threat of perjury. Putting Trump on the stand is as good an idea as putting a chimpanzee in a school play – he’s not going to stick to the script.” —Seth Meyers

“Trump can’t even answer softball questions from his friends on Fox News without going off on deranged tangents. It would take days. The networks would have to pre-empt all their programming so Trump could ramble about statues or ax murders or windmills or toilets that don’t flush, although it would be nice to get him under oath about the toilets he’s always talking about. The committee will also use footage from a documentary that shows the Trump associate Roger Stone anticipating the insurrection before the 2020 election. In footage captured by Danish film-makers for A Storm Foretold, Stone explains how Trump will discredit the election and use armed guards to refuse to cede power. Why do all these guys explain their criminal schemes out loud in highly specific details before they do them? They’re like Bond villains spelling out exactly how they’re going to kill him right before he slips out of his handcuffs.” —Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Miles Davis - What I Say / Live-Evil (1971)

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Russell Brand: Insider Trading - I Can’t Believe They Did This

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Jimmy Dore: Did FBI INSTIGATE The January 6 Riots?

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Plus, so awkward to ask for. (Don't mind if I do.)

September 2022

“We had been anticipating the next January 6th hearing on Wednesday, but the House select committee postponed it as Hurricane Ian barreled towards Florida. We hope everybody in Florida stays safe. Please, if you can, get out of the storm’s path. Worst-case scenario, tell Ron DeSantis you’re Venezuelan, maybe he gives you a free plane ride to Martha’s Vineyard.” —Stephen Colbert

“In international news, Putin’s war in Ukraine has been going so badly that the Russian leader ordered a draft, prompting many Russians to flee. Those who haven’t been able to leave have called hotlines to ask how to surrender. I get why they want to pre-emptively surrender, look at this video of a group of Russian soldiers instructed to bring tampons to the frontlines to stuff into bullet wounds. Tampons to plug gunshot wounds? That is awful. Plus, so awkward to ask for.” —Stephen Colbert

“And Buckingham Palace released King Charles III’s official monogram design. Take that, people who say the monarchy is an outdated institution that does nothing! They. Release. Monograms.” —Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Can’t you let us have anything? (reverse Angry Birds)

September 2022

“We are celebrating the success of Nasa’s mission to hit an asteroid with a spacecraft going 15,000mph, in a test of their ability to alter the path of space rocks on potential collision paths with Earth. Some have called the mission, known as Dart (Double Asteroid Redirection Test), the world’s first planetary defense mission, which is exciting news really for everyone other than the Space Force. They’re like ‘can’t you let us have anything?’” —Jimmy Kimmel

“The rocket weighed about 1,000 pounds, which is kinda amazing. Two large pigs weigh 1,000 pounds. Nasa’s plan to avoid the annihilation of humankind is basically a reverse Angry Birds.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“There was a control room celebration after the successful asteroid strike, in which Nasa staff hugged and high-fived. I feel like half the reason you take a job at Nasa is for this control room standing ovation moment. These people fired at and hit an asteroid more than 7 million miles away – they celebrated with a round of the lamest high-fives you’ve ever seen in your life.” —Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Wednesday, September 28, 2022

Red Devils - Queen Bee

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Red Devils - Ain't Nothin' But Right

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Hollywood Playboys - Nobody But You

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Black Time - A Band Apart

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

The Spastics - Take My Heart

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

The Mighty Go-Go Players - Fallin' With You, In Love With You

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Jerry Lee Lewis - What I Am Livin For (Unreleased) Elektra Outtakes. 1980

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

NHL: Toronto Maple Leafs vs Columbus Blue Jackets

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic.

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

The Spastics - Tell Me Lies

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Atomsmashers - Microwave Death

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

The Gorls - Planet Vator

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

DMZ - Baby Boom (1978)

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Gorls - Television Addict

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

The Duran: Putin's speech, nuclear conflict rhetoric ramps up

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

The Chesterfield Kings - Fluctuation

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Tuesday, September 27, 2022

She was so hot, guys, I wish you could’ve seen her, but she was so classified (There’s no rush. You’ve got plenty of time)

September 2022

“We looked into the case of JR Majewski, a GOP House candidate from northwest Ohio who appears to have lied about his military service. Majewski touted his combat experience in Afghanistan following 9/11, but military records show he served away from combat in Qatar. Majewski has denied misrepresenting his time in service, and claimed that all of his records of deployment are classified. Yeah, that’s right people, he cannot prove that he was in combat because all of the records are classified. And I believe him. Man, I’ve been there. When I was in middle school, my girlfriend was classified too, and it sucked. She was so hot, guys, I wish you could’ve seen her, but she was so classified.” —Trevor Noah

“An announcement from the governor of New York state, Kathy Hochul, that they plan to put surveillance cameras in every New York subway car. The plan is to have cameras in every train – basically the subway is starting an OnlyFans account. Which, I don’t know. This is either going to discourage public masturbators or really excite them. How are there not already cameras? There are cameras in every aisle at Duane Reade. I find it hard to even steal lipstick any more. The cameras won’t be installed until 2025, so if you were planning to commit a crime on the subway, there’s no rush. You’ve got plenty of time.” —Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

The Predatory Phase of Human Development (Spatial Hybrid Astronaut Redirection Technique)

September 2022

“There has been an escalation of threats from Vladimir Putin after a series of setbacks in his invasion of Ukraine. Putin vowed that Russia will use ‘all means at its disposal’ to continue the occupation of Ukraine, adding: ‘I am not bluffing.’ OK, the problem with Putin is, even if he was bluffing, it would be impossible to tell. The guy is a former KGB agent and he is addicted to Botox. His expression never changes. It doesn’t matter if he’s losing a war or riding a rollercoaster.” —Seth Meyers

“In a rally over the weekend, Donald Trump referenced Putin’s heated rhetoric, referring to ‘nuclear’ as ‘the N-word’. Now, I have to imagine there was some percentage of that crowd, however large or small, that heard that sentence and thought to themselves, ‘Oh my God, it’s finally happening.’” —Seth Meyers

“There is a significant space event: a NASA spacecraft deliberately hit an asteroid head-on at 15,000mph to see whether space rocks can be deflected away from earth. Now, before you start having panic sex with strangers on the sidewalk, I hope it’s not because of this asteroid. It wasn’t the big civilization ender that Ben Affleck will have to save us from. It wasn’t even headed to earth.” —Stephen Colbert

The mission – the Double Asteroid Redirection Test, or Dart – was to test if NASA could push a potentially dangerous asteroid off a collision course with Earth. Not to be confused with the mission to stop a real asteroid that’s going to destroy the planet, the ‘Spatial Hybrid Astronaut Redirection Technique’, or Shart.” —Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic.

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”