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Friday, January 31, 2020

The Corruption of the Democratic Party w/Jimmy Dore | Joe Rogan



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

DNC Members Plot Changing Rules To Cheat Bernie — The Political Vigilante



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Joe Rogan Responds to Bernie Sanders Endorsement Controversy



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

The Beatles - Revolution



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Madden: Indianapolis Colts vs New Orleans Saints (Super Bowl)



I have been working on a paper for the Education Market. The paper talks about using video games as a teaching tool for children with learning disabilities. The age demographic would be 8 to 18. Games could be up to the teacher or student to choose. Games might include soccer, football, basketball, etc.

Students could learn about various historical or fictional characters and create them as players for their team. It would allow the student to study history, philosophy, religion, sports, popular culture, etc. and then create the characters to be a part of their team. The students would even be able to play alongside their created characters.

On some of the teams historical figures like Martin Luther King, and Abraham Lincoln will play on the same team with authors like Ernest Hemingway and William Shakespeare, or Elvis Presley and Tupac Shakur. 

The process is meant to be a simple and fun way for kids to learn subjects such as world history, literature, poetry, art, music, science and vocabulary. Maybe PS4/XBOX machines might be donated or discounted to schools for these classes. More on the paper as it is fleshed out. Enjoy the simulations.

Also for sentimental reasons, some fallen friends and family are on this team. Semper Fi. May you rest in peace.

On the Indianapolis Colts

Former Colt players, Marvin Harrison, Reggie Wayne, Dwight Freeney, Robert Mathis, Bob Sanders, Andrew Luck, T.Y. Hilton

LT Paul McCartney, musician The Beatles
LT Nelson Mandela, South African leader
LG Jesus Christ, some folks Lord and Savior
LG Ringo Starr, musician The Beatles
C Charles Bukowski, poet
C Muddy Waters, musician
RG God
RG Winston Churchill, English Prime Minister
RT John Lennon, musician The Beatles
RT George Harrison, musician The Beatles
TE/DT Clay Brannon, boy wonder
WR/DE Jeremiah Brewster, wonder boy

DT Army, Jack Renforth (RIP), TE Paul Bantley (RIP), HB/LB G. Hulse, Army, HB J. Purkey, Navy, T.F., Marines, David Wood, Marines, Ian Betts, Navy

More Colts players include Martin Luther King, Stephen Hawking, Albert Einstein, as well as characters from Star Trek…

Jeanluc Picard, Cmndr Worf, Cmdr Data, James Kirk,  Mr Spock, Jonathan Archer, Cmdr Tuvok, Geordi LaForge, Ben Sisko, etc.

Elizabeth Warren's Campaign Is A Slow Waddling Disaster | Weirdest Pandering Idea Ever



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Arctic Monkeys - Red Right Hand



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

The Monsters - Acid Dreams





“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

The Radiacs she's my witch



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

The Vice Barons - Fuzzy n' Wild



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Bernie Releases A+ Ads Right Before Iowa Caucus



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Debby Does Abbottabad/Deep Goat/Bare Ankles 4/2 Humps, 1 Camel (God Bless the Rich)


"The SEALs recovered an extensive stash of pornography from Bin Laden's compound. It's probably not easy just having sex with the same 11 wives all the time. There were interesting titles: 'Debby Does Abbottabad,' 'Deep Goat,' 'Bare Ankles 4,' and '2 Humps, 1 Camel.'" –Jimmy Fallon

"Another Republican is about to announce he is running for president. Newt Gingrich is about to announce. Some people say Newt Gingrich may have trouble winning over traditional values voters because he has had three marriages. So as a result, the campaign has announced a new slogan, 'Newt Gingrich, so committed to marriage, he can't stop doing it.'" –Conan O'Brien 

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”


Bernie WRECKS Trump in New Ad



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Joe Biden's LIES About Involvement In Civil Rights Movement



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Top Ten Surprises in the Osama bin Laden Diary (coconut shrimp bites)


"When I heard bin Laden had been killed I went, 'Oh, great. NOW what's Oprah going to do for her last guest?'" –David Letterman

David Letterman's "Top Ten Surprises in the Osama bin Laden Diary" 

10. Always dotted the 'I' in 'Jihad' with a smiley face 

9. Expressed anger at not being invited to the royal wedding

8. Disguised himself by wearing a fake beard over his real beard

7. Was the first one to suggest Hugh Grant as a possible replacement for Charlie Sheen

6. Admitted in college he experimented with a member of the opposite sect

5. Preferred exploding boxers to exploding briefs

4. As much as he hated the United States, he loved Red Lobster's coconut shrimp bites

3. The guy just wouldn't shut up about the new Beastie Boys album

2. Would occasionally fax jokes to Leno

1. Turns out he was kind of a coward

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”


Donald Trump Calls Obama About His Mexican Wall - CONAN on TBS



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Why Did Biden Drop Out Of The Dem Primary In 1988?



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Krystal Ball: Bernie vs Biden's closing pitch before Iowa



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Former Clinton Advisor Has DELUSIONAL Break Down On Sanders



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

David Doel: Joe Biden's History Of Lies Is Too Risky For Democrats



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

What is it that makes Donald Trump so innocent and handsome? (Does this look infected to you?)


“It can be anything they want, as long as they write it down. For instance, Senator Capito asked, ‘When did Ukraine learn that the aid was frozen?’ Senator Peters asked, ‘Does impeachment require a criminal violation?’ And Ted Cruz asked, ‘Does this look infected to you?’” —Trevor Noah

“The whole process makes no sense. If the senators have a question, why not let them ask the question? Or if chief justice is going to have to read it out, then he should at least have to do an impression of the senator who asked the question. Then it makes it fun.” —Trevor Noah

“For most of the day, senators just asked questions to their own side that gave them another chance to repeat their talking points. Democrats asked, ‘Donald Trump is guilty, isn’t he?’ And Republicans asked, ‘What is it that makes Donald Trump so innocent and handsome?’” —Trevor Noah

“It got awkward when Roberts was like, ‘O.K., next question: Why is John Roberts such a wang? Oh come on, guys, grow up!’” —Jimmy Fallon

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

your temporarily uncut brake cables/and threw them in Jeffrey Epstein’s prison cell/No Things Considered


“During an interview on NPR’s ‘All Things Considered’ last Friday, Secretary of State Mike Pompeo refused to answer questions about Ukraine. So if you have all this stuff you don’t want to be asked about, maybe don’t go on a show called ‘All Things Considered.’ They mean ‘all things.’ If you don’t like questions, I think Fox News has a show called ‘No Things Considered.’” —Seth Meyers

“Guys, more revelations are coming out from John Bolton’s new book. Apparently, he was afraid that Trump was granting favors to the leaders of Turkey and China. I’m not saying Trump wants this book to disappear, but he just bought all the copies and threw them in Jeffrey Epstein’s prison cell.” —Jimmy Fallon

“Today we learned that the White House issued a formal threat to Bolton to keep him from publishing his book. Wow, so rare for Trump to issue a formal threat. [Imitating Trump] ‘Dearest esteemed colleague, it is my sincerest recommendation that you keep one eye open while you sleep. Best regards to your family and your temporarily uncut brake cables, Donald J. Trump.’” —Stephen Colbert

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”


Krystal and Saagar: Bernie breaking through Biden's Texas firewall



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

The Hill: Will Biden's sad ground game hand Iowa to Bernie?



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

whatever necrosis is making Rudy Giuliani decompose/zombie apocalypse/it won’t be because I’m Irish


“John Bolton’s book won’t be officially released until March 17, which, of course, is St. Patrick’s Day. So this year, when I’m drunk and throwing up, it won’t be because I’m Irish.” —Stephen Colbert

The Center for Disease Control has been monitoring over 100 people in the US for coronavirus, and maintains the threat is minimal. The good news is, the CDC is working hard to contain and study the coronavirus, The bad news is that same CDC has lost a dangerous amount of its funding. In recent years, the CDC has scaled back work in dozens of countries based on budget cuts; it cut efforts to prevent outbreaks in foreign countries by 80% in 2018. Despite the obvious benefits too funding an agency that prevents a zombie apocalypse, the Trump administration’s budget proposal actually recommended another 10% cut to the CDC’s funding. How does a notorious germaphobe cut the budget of an agency that fights infectious diseases? Just tell Trump the CDC needs the money to keep him from catching whatever necrosis is making Rudy Giuliani decompose. —Samantha Bee

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Wow! Crazy. How did that happen,” said a lonely farmer (Who’s his character witness? R. Kelly?)


You’re telling me the United States can’t figure out how to remove a crazy dictator? We’ve been practicing all over the world for 100 years. We’re kind of famous for it. That would be like Jamaica forgetting how to unwind. —Michael Che

Trump is so confident he’s going to win he’s using Jeffrey Epstein’s lawyer to represent him. Talk about credibility. Who’s his character witness? R. Kelly? —Michael Che

The US Navy has for the first time ever named an aircraft carrier in honor of an African-American sailor. And he must have been pretty brave joining the navy not knowing how to swim. I’m just kidding. The ship will be called the USS Guy From the Village People. —Michael Che

According to a new report, in 257 years, women around the world will be paid the same as men. So stop complaining. —Michael Che

A goat has been born in India, with a genetic deformity that makes it look like it has a human face. “Wow! Crazy. How did that happen,” said a lonely farmer. 

—Michael Che

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”


“Wait, which porn site,” said your husband just now (Wait, how much does it pay?)


Joe Biden rejected the idea of testifying in the impeachment trial saying, “I want no part of that.” While his son Hunter Biden said, “Wait, how much does it pay?” —Colin Jost

Rudy Giuliani launched a podcast called Rudy Giuliani Common Sense. It’s the first podcast ever recorded and uploaded accidentally from a pants pocket. 
—Colin Jost

Derek Jeter was voted into the Hall of Fame by the Baseball Writer’s Association but was one vote shy of aa unanimous decision. In case you were wondering if Derek Jeter ever slept with a baseball writer’s wife. —Colin Jost

 A popular porn website has suffered a massive data breach that exposed users’ identities and credit card numbers. “Wait, which porn site,” said your husband just now. —Colin Jost

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”


Thursday, January 30, 2020

I assume to symbolize how the founding fathers are spinning in their graves (I am the chosen one!)


The impeachment trial started this week. Am I crazy or was Adam Schiff on my television for 100 hours straight? Even when I turned the TV off there was still an outline of him burned into the screen. —Colin Jost

Democrats spent three days laying out in great detail on how President Trump has been the greatest abuser of power in American history. And the republicans laid out their defense, the shrug emoji. —Colin Jost

Mitch McConnell seen here calmly watching an orphanage burn, defended his plan for the trial saying, “The country is waiting to see if we can rise to the occasion.” I would say you are not rising to the occasion considering one senator fell asleep, Rand Paul was doing a crossword puzzle and some republican senators even brought fidget spinners to play with. I assume to symbolize how the founding fathers are spinning in their graves. —Colin Jost 

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Madden: Indianapolis Colts vs Washington Redskins (Super Bowl)



I have been working on a paper for the Education Market. The paper talks about using video games as a teaching tool for children with learning disabilities. The age demographic would be 8 to 18. Games could be up to the teacher or student to choose. Games might include soccer, football, basketball, etc.

Students could learn about various historical or fictional characters and create them as players for their team. It would allow the student to study history, philosophy, religion, sports, popular culture, etc. and then create the characters to be a part of their team. The students would even be able to play alongside their created characters.

On some of the teams historical figures like Martin Luther King, and Abraham Lincoln will play on the same team with authors like Ernest Hemingway and William Shakespeare, or Elvis Presley and Tupac Shakur. 

The process is meant to be a simple and fun way for kids to learn subjects such as world history, literature, poetry, art, music, science and vocabulary. Maybe PS4/XBOX machines might be donated or discounted to schools for these classes. More on the paper as it is fleshed out. Enjoy the simulations.

Also for sentimental reasons, some fallen friends and family are on this team. Semper Fi. May you rest in peace.

On the Indianapolis Colts

Former Colt players, Marvin Harrison, Reggie Wayne, Dwight Freeney, Robert Mathis, Bob Sanders, Andrew Luck, T.Y. Hilton

LT Paul McCartney, musician The Beatles
LT Nelson Mandela, South African leader
LG Jesus Christ, some folks Lord and Savior
LG Ringo Starr, musician The Beatles
C Charles Bukowski, poet
C Muddy Waters, musician
RG God
RG Winston Churchill, English Prime Minister
RT John Lennon, musician The Beatles
RT George Harrison, musician The Beatles
TE/DT Clay Brannon, boy wonder
WR/DE Jeremiah Brewster, wonder boy

DT Army, Jack Renforth (RIP), TE Paul Bantley (RIP), HB/LB G. Hulse, Army, HB J. Purkey, Navy, T.F., Marines, David Wood, Marines, Ian Betts, Navy

More Colts players include Martin Luther King, Stephen Hawking, Albert Einstein, as well as characters from Star Trek…

Jeanluc Picard, Cmndr Worf, Cmdr Data, James Kirk,  Mr Spock, Jonathan Archer, Cmdr Tuvok, Geordi LaForge, Ben Sisko, etc.

Thee Attacks - On the move



“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”