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Showing posts with label Rachel Maddow. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Rachel Maddow. Show all posts

Saturday, November 22, 2025

This wasn't what I meant when I said I wanted to have kids (wait till you see what his boyfriend has)


Disgraced ex Harvard president Larry Summers reportedly spent his honeymoon on Epstein Island, which really upset his wife, who said, "This wasn't what I meant when I said I wanted to have kids." —Greg Gutfeld


Some people were shocked to see Rachel Maddow at the funeral for Dick Cheney. True, it's the first time she's ever shown up for Dick. —Greg Gutfeld


According to a new list, women think it's a good sign if a guy's apartment has expensive candles, nice hand soap, and wine glasses. And if you think that's nice, ladies, wait till you see what his boyfriend has. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Sunday, October 5, 2025

the omelet station at Mar-a-Lago (an attack on every American)


“Democrats want Republicans to agree to continue funding the Affordable Care Act, whereas Republicans want to use that money to add crab legs to the omelet station at Mar-a-Lago.” — Jimmy Kimmel

“And Trump is threatening to make ‘irreversible cuts' if there’s a shut down, which — you know what? I was recently the victim of a government shutdown. They are reversible, I will tell you that.” — Jimmy Kimmel


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Saturday, September 27, 2025

Never forget what you're fighting for (3-wood/Smirnoff 100)


Kamala Harris told Rachel Maddow that her race against Trump ended up being the closest presidential election in the 21st century. When asked about proof, she said, “I prefer Smirnoff 100.” —Greg Gutfeld


New York Governor Kathy Hochul was booed by fans when she was brought up on stage at the Ryder Cup Golf Tournament. But the worst moment came when golfers mistook her face for a 3-wood. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Tuesday, June 17, 2025

then maybe walk around the neighborhood till you calm down (two bonus minutes)


It started with Trump’s plan to turn the air traffic control functions of the FAA into a nonprofit corporation. Although, to be fair, any company Trump runs is eventually nonprofit. –Stephen Colbert


If you remember a few weeks ago the democrats proposed a $1 Trillion infrastructure deal, and Trump said, “Why not $2 Trillion?” So they said Okay. Today was just supposed to be hammering out the details, but it didn’t work out that way. Trump walked in, didn’t shake anyone’s hand or take a seat, and left before anyone else could speak. All told, it was over in three minutes. According to Stormy Daniels that’s two bonus minutes. --Stephen Colbert


This week Denver became the first city to decriminalize hallucinogenic mushrooms. This is going to change their whole approach to tourism. “Denver: Come stare at the wood grain on the door, then maybe walk around the neighborhood till you calm down.” --Stephen Colbert


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”



 

Friday, March 7, 2025

Even Rachel Maddow thinks that's a good number (Let that sink in)


According to a CNN poll, that's right CNN, 69% had a positive reaction to President Trump’s speech. 69! Even Rachel Maddow thinks that's a good number. —Greg Gutfeld


No wonder all the sane Dems are depressed. John Fetterman summed the dem's behavior up on Tuesday as, “A sad cavalcade of self- owns and unhinged petulance. It only makes Trump look more presidential and restrained.” Yeah, and Fetterman is the guy who would wear sweats and a hoodie to a funeral. —Greg Gutfeld


Bottom line, Trump Derangement Syndrome became Trump Derangement Strategy, and by taking over the party it forced them to come out against everything Trump was for which as it turned out was everything the American public was for. So it left the Dems with nothing but hate. So I do wish the Dem's luck who are trying to rid themselves of the craziest angriest people in their party. But if you had listened to me three years ago and not the weepy Jimmy Kimmel’s of the world, you wouldn't be in this mess. You're a brain dead party which serves you right for electing a brain dead president. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Thursday, February 27, 2025

It's a sad moment for the show (Four out of five citizens love democracy!)


It's a sad moment for the show. Joy Reid is out. Of course we’re heartbroken for she provided this show with more material than a seamstress at The View. On slow news days Joy was always there to help with a racist rant. I loved her. 

Now I don't like to use hyperbole but Joy’s firing is the biggest blow to racists since the Confederacy lost. But you got to wonder how she was able to last this long. The irony of course is in her name, for did Joy bring any joy to anyone's life? I'm willing to bet no one ever said, you know I was going through a tough period in my life and listening to Joy Reid really got me through it. If anything it was their tough periods in life that that got them through Joy Reid. 

But that's the problem with MSNBC and Legacy Media. Their income was based on making life worse instead of focusing on real stuff. They created hoaxes, ones that sew division in hopelessness. 

Now, Joy’s firing came on the heels of MSNBC's parent company NBC Universal, settling a $30 million defamation lawsuit with a Georgia gynecologist. In 2020 the network reported that the doctor working at an ICE Detention Center was performing unwanted hysterectomies on immigrant women. The network called the doctor the ‘uterus collector’. I know, that was my nickname in college. Chris Hayes was one of those who peddled this story about the ‘uterus collector’ but his only proof was that his was missing. 

And yes the story sounds horrible, almost too horrible to be believed. But for people in Legacy Media who suspend Common Sense on all things Trump, it was just too good to check. It had to be true, but it wasn’t. And the tip off right away is that these hacks would actually condemn a doctor forcibly collecting uteruses. And you think the fact that no one else was reporting this might have been another clue for these great investigative journalists? 

So how far were they off? Well the judge in the case states that there’s ‘undisputed evidence has been established that there were no mass hysterectomies at the facility.’ And the doctor is not quote ‘a uterus collector’. So other than that, their reporting was perfect. So MSNBC has reportedly decided to settle up rather than risk a trial. 

But you still got to wonder how this story, this hoax, got this far? Well what was the point of the hoax in the first place? To damage Trump and his determination to finally tighten the border. They wanted to believe it was true, you know like when I told that flight attendant it was a war injury. 

The the anchors just love the idea that there was a sinister doctor forcibly removing uteruses so that these women couldn't have kids after entering the US. It's so evil, so fascist, so Trumpian. Seriously, how soon will Hollywood make a movie of that? The evil doctor could be played by Kevin Spacey and the uterus could be played by Peter Dinklage. It makes no sense. 

But again, how did they fall for this garbage? Well first, maybe they felt that if they were wrong, of course no would would check, but also any belief system is a Continuum and if you go far enough out with it you can arrive at a very bad place. Especially if you already start at a bad place, like saying Trump is Hitler. 

Joy Reid said in 2024 that if Biden were in a coma, she would vote for him. Why not, you did the same thing in 2020? Meanwhile coma patients are blinking out Morse Code for, come on guys we're not that bad! Amazing, but you can see how Joy laid the groundwork for the hoax. 

So what's left of MSNBC? Well they're replacing Joy with a three-person panel, so if it's a slow news day they can call each other racist. Which raises the other question. Rachel Maddow and the others pushed the uterus story, Reid did not. So why is Joy fired and the rest of them aren’t? Is it because they're all white? I mean here's a case where Joy can actually cry racism, and finally for once, it might be true. —Greg Gutfeld


 https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


Thursday, January 16, 2025

Which has the public demanding more wildfires (finger quotes)


Meghan Markle is postponing the debut of her latest Netflix show due to the concern over wildfires. Which has the public demanding more wildfires. —Greg Gutfeld       


So with Donald Trump becoming president Rachel Maddow will return to MSNBC five nights a week. In related news Doritos will be adding more asbestos. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.” 


 

Monday, April 8, 2024

Russia was in my cereal this morning (gift baskets)


This is pretty cool. Scientists have built a 6'10" robot that can hit perfect three-pointers. Unfortunately, rival scientists built a 6'11" robot that can say, "Not in my house." --Jimmy Fallon


President Trump has been keeping busy. He just met with the leaders of Latvia, Estonia, and Lithuania. And until that meeting, Trump thought Latvia, Estonia, and Lithuania were cast members on "Real Housewives." [imitates Trump] "Do you know Melania?" --Jimmy Fallon


Amazon Prime just unveiled new buttons you can press to order Doritos, Red Bull, and Trojan condoms. Or as that's called in New Jersey, “A gift basket.” –Jimmy Fallon


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”



 

Saturday, February 3, 2024

Russia was in my cereal this morning (I’m sorry, that should be 70-24-36)


According to a new poll, Chris Christie currently has the lowest approval rating for any governor in any state, in over 20 years. ”Wow,” said former Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich from prison. –Seth Meyers


President Trump today met with executives from the pharmaceutical industry, and they once again explained to him that there’s no such thing as Viagra for your hands. –Seth Meyers


Happy birthday to Dolly Parton, who turned 70 today. I’m sorry, that should be 70-24-36. –Seth Meyers


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”



 

Tuesday, February 28, 2023

Great. Now, I need a new campaign slogan (Nobody knows what they’re doing)


Today in Congress, Donald Trump's former lawyer, Michael Cohen, testified about the president and all his scandals. Yep. He called Trump a "conman," a "cheat," and a "racist." Trump heard that and was like, "Great. Now, I need a new 2020 campaign slogan." --Jimmy Fallon


Over the weekend, Vice President Mike Pence tweeted his support for Israel, but accidentally used an emoji of the Nicaraguan flag instead of the Israeli flag. The White House says there’s a perfectly good reason why he did it: Nobody knows what they’re doing. –Jimmy Fallon


"Yesterday a federal judge suspended President Obama's executive order on immigration. When asked if he's mad about being overruled, Obama said, 'You know I've been married for 23 years, right?'" –Jimmy Fallon


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”



 

Wednesday, October 26, 2022

But you know to be fair he is opposed to the idea of any kind of human pride (Rachel Maddow can connect Kevin Bacon to Russia in just two steps)


Rob Ford he's in the news he wants to take down the gay pride flag flying over the Toronto City Hall. But you know to be fair he is opposed to the idea of any kind of human pride. --Jimmy Dore 2/16/14


One hundred percent we don't live our values in this country. We live in a surveillance state. We don't value liberty or privacy. The government does whatever it wants. We say we're the home of the free. Really, home of the free? We lock up more people than any other country. The United States is five percent of the world's population, yet we have twenty five percent of the world's incarcerated population. We're the world's largest penal colony. --Jimmy Dore 7/19/19


Let me tell you something. Russia didn't make half the country poor or low income. Russia didn't render 63% of our residents unable to afford $1,000 emergency. Russia didn't make 29 million Americans not have healthcare. Russia didn't make medical costs the biggest reason for bankruptcies. Russia didn’t bury our citizens in debt, and Russia didn't outsource our jobs. --Jimmy Dore 8/29/18 


You know, Rachel Maddow can connect Kevin Bacon to Russia in just two steps. --Jimmy Dore 6/14/18


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Wednesday, September 7, 2022

It’s like finding out your dog collects stamps (It’s OK, I took my ring off first)


September 2022

“What happened this summer? Women lost the right to choose, monkeypox spread and Batgirl was cancelled. I’ll never go away again, I promise.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“Speaking of going away, Donald Trump is in serious legal trouble. I’ve been trying to understand how he could possibly think he had the right to take all those documents to his house. It’s weird that a person who barely reads would even want documents. It’s like finding out your dog collects stamps.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“Trump keeps claiming he declassified the documents, which first of all, he didn’t. Second of all, even if he had, which he didn’t, that’s even more crazy. That’s like finding your wife in bed with another guy and she’s like, ‘It’s OK, I took my ring off first.’” —Jimmy Kimmel

“In other news, Russia announced a new travel ban for life to 25 Americans, including the secretary of commerce, six US senators and the actor Ben Stiller. Funny, every Russian we sanction is some sweaty evil oligarch who dumps poison in the ocean or something. Russia turns around and bans Zoolander.” —Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Thursday, September 1, 2022

Rachel Maddow can connect Kevin Bacon to Russia in just two steps (Why the Revolutionary War had to happen)


Let me tell you something. Russia didn't make half the country poor or low income. Russia didn't render 63% of our residents unable to afford $1,000 emergency. Russia didn't make 29 million Americans not have healthcare. Russia didn't make medical costs the biggest reason for bankruptcies. Russia didn’t bury our citizens in debt. Russia didn't outsource our jobs. --Jimmy Dore 8/29/18 


You know, Rachel Maddow can connect Kevin Bacon to Russia in just two steps. --Jimmy Dore 6/14/18


Recently a study published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences suggested there could be as many as 11 billion planets capable of supporting life in the Milky Way alone. So if you feel like a meaningless speck, you may be on to something. —Jimmy Dore 1/29/14


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Saturday, July 30, 2022

They haven't been this excited since Oktoberfest included an all-you-can-eat wiener buffet ($30,000 a day)


July 2014

"Germany is your World Cup champions, ladies and gentlemen. The winning German soccer team received a congratulatory phone call from Angela Merkel. Of course we know this because we're still bugging her phone." –David Letterman


"Congratulations, my German friends. They are World Cup champions. People in Germany were going nuts, firing guns into the air, marching up and down the streets. Then they heard about the World Cup win." –Craig Ferguson 


"Germans haven't been this excited since the release of the last David Hasselhoff album. They haven't been this excited since Oktoberfest included an all-you-can-eat wiener buffet." –Craig Ferguson


"People in Germany went bonkers. Rumor has it that up to half a dozen Germans actually cracked a smile." –Craig Ferguson


"Well, it was an amazing weekend in sports. LeBron James went back to being a Cavalier, Carmelo Anthony, went back to being a Knick, and soccer went back to being a thing you drive your kids to." –Seth Meyers


"Germany defeated Argentina 1-0 to win the World Cup. German fans went absolutely crazy from 9:00 until 9:15." –Seth Meyers 


"Brazil's coach resigned following the country's historic 7-1 loss in the World Cup last week. He says he wants to spend more time focusing on not being murdered." –Seth Meyers


http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Sunday, July 10, 2022

Rachel Maddow can connect Kevin Bacon to Russia in just two steps (and of course the boogieman)


Recently a study published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences suggested there could be as many as 11 billion planets capable of supporting life in the Milky Way alone. So if you feel like a meaningless speck, you may be on to something. —Jimmy Dore 1/29/14


As Americans we probably forgive more than we should. I mean we still give George Bush credit that 9/11 only happened once. —Jimmy Dore 4/22/13


You know, Rachel Maddow can connect Kevin Bacon to Russia in just two steps. --Jimmy Dore 6/14/18


"All the problems we face in the United States today can be traced to an unenlightened immigration policy on the part of the American Indian."--Pat Paulsen (1968)


"We have nothing to fear but fear itself...and of course the boogieman."--Pat Paulsen (1968)


http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Saturday, July 9, 2022

You know, Rachel Maddow can connect Kevin Bacon to Russia in just two steps (Both major parties need to go)



You know, Rachel Maddow can connect Kevin Bacon to Russia in just two steps. --Jimmy Dore 6/14/18


Let me tell you something. Russia didn't make half the country poor or low income. Russia didn't render 63% of our residents unable to afford $1,000 emergency. Russia didn't make 29 million Americans not have healthcare. Russia didn't make medical costs the biggest reason for bankruptcies. Russia didn’t bury our citizens in debt. Russia didn't outsource our jobs. --Jimmy Dore 8/29/18 


Super Tuesday was this week and I just want to say congratulations to hatred and ignorance. Republicans voters have given you a big victory this week. Oh, by the way, I you know what they call the Monday before Super Tuesday they call it racist Xmas eve. --Jimmy Dore 3/3/16


http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Tuesday, March 29, 2022

the only remaining White House staffers are Mike Pence and a Roomba (55% is less than half)


Rachel Maddow aired an exclusive report last night uncovering a portion of President Trump’s 2005 tax return. Specifically the part where he claimed Ivanka and Donald Jr. as dependents and tried to write off Eric as a loss. –Seth Meyers

Well, congratulations to everyone who had Rex Tillerson in their office pool. President Trump has fired Rex Tillerson, his secretary of state, which I think means the only remaining White House staffers are Mike Pence and a Roomba. --Seth Meyers

A woman in Wisconsin was arrested over the weekend after allegedly handing out marijuana cookies at a St. Patrick's Day parade. Police became suspicious when nobody got into a fistfight. --Seth Meyers

According to a new poll, 55% of Americans are in favor of abolishing the electoral college, but unfortunately, because of the electoral college, 55% is less than half. --Seth Meyers

That's right. 89 years ago today, Colonel Sanders founded fast-food chain KFC. And boy, was Trump pissed when he found out he still had to come to work today. Meyers as Trump, "It's a holiday!" --Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”