"The chancellor of
Germany disengaged herself from the president of the United States using a move
she learned in date rape prevention class. If that was Clinton going in for
Merkel, somehow her bra would be off." --Jon Stewart, on Bush groping
German Chancellor Angela Merkel
"Karl Rove's new
talking point for the Republicans is that the terrorists are like the Nazis,
and anyone against the Iraq War is like the appeasers before World War II. If
that doesn't work they're going to use Bush's analogy, where bin Laden is a
Klingon and he's Captain Kirk." --Bill Maher
"In a speech
yesterday, California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger announce that he 'supports
lessening our dependence on foreign oil.' Unfortunately, it came out sounding
more like, 'I support lesbian independence for all.'" --Conan O'Brien
"New York is on a
heightened state of alert. They say New Yorkers should be aware of suspicious
activity. I'm thinking, 'Hell, that's our number one industry.'" --David
Letterman
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