Wow, I’m running for leader of the wrong country (fake monk)

Because of England’s Brexit vote, there’s now talk in Scotland and Northern Ireland about leaving the UK. And when I say "talk," I mean loud, angry, incomprehensible talk. –Conan O’Brien

Critics are calling those in Britain who voted to pull out of the European Union "racist" and "anti-immigrant." After hearing this, Donald Trump said, "Wow, I’m running for leader of the wrong country." –Conan O’Brien

Tourists visiting New York City are being warned about "fake monks" on the street who wear orange robes and demand money. Quick tip - if they stab you . . . fake monk. –Conan O’Brien