Bush is so unpopular, he had to sneak back into this country (losing altitude)

"While he was there, Bush met with the Iraq's prime minister and wasted no time finding out how the new government is doing. The first thing President Bush asked the new prime minister was, 'You guys aren't allowing any of those gay marriages, are ya?'" --Jay Leno

"The sad part of President Bush's trip. He's so unpopular, he had to sneak back into this country." --Jay Leno

"The Bush administration is back. Yesterday the president made a top secret visit to Baghdad. Here's how he pulled it off: Monday, 7:45 p.m. During a post-dinner discussion of Iraq, Bush tells his aides that he's tired, saying 'I'm losing altitude. I'm going to read.' That should raise some suspicions right there, but it doesn't. The game is afoot. He slips into a waiting helicopter that whisks him to Andrews Air Force base. From there he flies to Baghdad where the Iraqi people get a taste of hand delivered democracy. Ding-dong. Get the door, it's freedom. Meanwhile, back here in the States, unaware citizens expect a presidential news conference in the Rose Garden thanks to a misleading schedule released by the White House press office. Now you see him and just like that, he's gone." --Stephen Colbert