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Saturday, July 30, 2016

The Great Wall of Chimichanga (Mission Accomplished)



"The United States Senate today took some steps to keep illegal immigrants out of our 'American Idol' competitions. They voted to build a 370-mile long fence along the border between the U.S. and Mexico. They also announced that they're going to hire illegal immigrant workers to build it. The Senators voted overwhelmingly for the fence. As I said, it is 370 miles long. Unfortunately, the actual border with Mexico is more than 2,000 miles long. So, I guess the message is 'go around.' Tentatively, they're calling it 'The Great Wall of Chimichanga.'" --Jimmy Kimmel

"President Bush is going to address the nation Monday night on the immigration issue. Bush said he would have given the address tonight, but they couldn't get the 'Mission Accomplished' sign finished in Spanish soon enough." --Jay Leno

"Big personnel change at the White House. Yesterday, President Bush's chief speechwriter announced he's leaving the White House. His exact words were, 'Me go now.'" --Conan O'Brien

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