"President Bush is
sending troops to the Mexican border. He's going to have them look for tequila
of mass destruction." --David Letterman
"The Bush administration
is tightening immigration now. In order to cross the United States, you have to
have legal documentation. If you want to get into the United States you have to
have legal documentation or a 95 mile an hour fast ball." --David
Letterman
"The Senate yesterday
voted to make English the national language of the United States and also our
national muffin. The English muffin. I'm glad they took some time out to work
on that." --Jimmy Kimmel
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