Hey, if there's one thing we know how to build, it's a wall (Shut Up vs. No, You Shut Up)

"The U.S. government has issued a warning to builders not to use Chinese drywall because they say it's defective. The Chinese government denied this and said, 'Hey, if there's one thing we know how to build, it's a wall.'" --Conan O'Brien

"People in New York are especially excited by Judge Sotomayor because she comes from the Bronx. In fact, Judge Sotomayor famously presided over the landmark New York City case, Shut Up vs. No, You Shut Up." --Conan O'Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

you already see through the psyops (junk in the trunk)

New research shows that too much sitting could damage your brain, which explains why Stephen Hawking was such a dumbass. —Michael Che

A new survey found that the worst litterers in New York City are men from the Bronx and Queens, while women from the Bronx and Queens safely keep all their junk in the trunk. —Michael Che

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Well, technically, he was half man, half iced tea (It's not even hard)

With just two weeks before the presidential election, we have officially entered into the fever dream portion of the campaign. Right is left, up is down, the Republican nominee is hanging out at a Bronx barber’s shop, while the Democrat is hosting some sort of book club with Liz Cheney. What the fuck?! —Jon Stewart 

“While speaking over the weekend at a campaign rally in Pennsylvania, former President Trump discussed golf legend Arnold Palmer and said he was ‘all man.’ Well, technically, he was half man, half iced tea.” —Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

The top theory so far being the guy yelling, AAAAAHHHHHHH! (Now, if he can only remember his ATM code)

Boeing announced that the head of their troubled 737 Max program is leaving the company after he was sucked out of an emergency exit. —Colin Jost

New York City police are trying to determine the owner of a human leg found abandoned on a Bronx subway track. The top theory so far being the guy yelling, AAAAAHHHHHHH! —Colin Jost

The Alabama Supreme Court ruled that embryos created through IVF are children and that black embryos can be tried as adults. —Colin Jost

It was reported that President Biden’s campaign ended its January fund-raising with $56 Million in the bank. Now, if he can only remember his ATM code. —Colin Jost

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Because right now, that’s the only way a Red Sox fan can get a win in the Bronx (Or, as I prefer, ‘Jennifer 2: Jen-flecktric Boogaffleck.’)

July 2022

“That’s right, Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez reportedly got married over the weekend. Because right now, that’s the only way a Red Sox fan can get a win in the Bronx.” —Seth Meyers

“That’s right, they got married at a drive-through chapel. You know inflation is bad when even those two are, like, ‘Let’s just do it in Vegas.’ The guy who married them was, like, ‘Wow, you two are the best Ben and J. Lo impersonators I’ve ever seen — you’re really good.’” —Jimmy Fallon

“Love is real! If they can make it work, there’s hope for every attractive millionaire celebrity couple with a skin-care line.” —Stephen Colbert

“And as I’m sure you know, the two were engaged years ago, but now they’ve made it official. It’s Bennifer again-i-fer! Or, as I prefer, ‘Jennifer 2: Jen-flecktric Boogaffleck.’” —Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s The Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

I was more offended by the way he eats a buttered roll in front of company (Bronx WMDs)

"A Tomahawk cruise missile fell off a truck in the Bronx this week. A cruise missile, isn't that unbelievable? You know what that means? There are now more weapons of mass destruction in the Bronx than there are in Iraq." --Jay Leno

"I have to say I was a little disappointed. Not once did Bush apologize to Oprah for lying about weapons of mass destruction in Iraq." --Jay Leno

"A lot of people were offended by President Bush using a four-letter word at the G-8 Summit the other day. Were you offended? I was more offended by the way he eats a buttered roll in front of company." --Jay Leno

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Hey lady, I don't deal with oil companies. That's more Satan's area (Bronx WMDs)

"She said at her church, Governor Palin, said she

asked everyone to pray for a natural gas pipeline,

which she said was God’s will. And today, God said,

"Hey lady, I don't deal with oil companies. That's

more Satan's area.'" --Jay Leno

 

"According to a series of just published letters

that Albert Einstein sent to his second wife, he

had ten mistresses. He would send his wife letters

about his mistresses and then ask her for advice.

Or as Bill Clinton called him, 'a trailblazer, a pioneer.'"

--Jay Leno

"A Tomahawk cruise missile fell off a truck in

the Bronx this week. A cruise missile, isn't that

unbelievable? You know what that means?

There are now more weapons of mass destruction

in the Bronx than there are in Iraq." --Jay Leno

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night 

of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

I was more offended by the way he eats a buttered roll in front of company (Joe Cones)

Donald Trump said that Iran shooting at one of our ships was a big mistake. Trump knows all about mistakes. He’s had three wives and Eric. --Stephen Colbert

Coming into this evening, Joe Biden had a big lead in all the polls, and to celebrate, his supporters handed out free ice cream they called Joe Cones. A Joe Cone is also what Biden wears to make sure he respects personal space. --Stephen Colbert

"A Tomahawk cruise missile fell off a truck in the Bronx this week. A cruise missile, isn't that unbelievable? You know what that means? There are now more weapons of mass destruction in the Bronx than there are in Iraq." --Jay Leno

"A lot of people were offended by President Bush using a four-letter word at the G-8 Summit the other day. Were you offended? I was more offended by the way he eats a buttered roll in front of company." --Jay Leno

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

A Tomahawk cruise missile fell off a truck in the Bronx this week (That's more Satan's area)

"She said at her church, Governor Palin, said she asked everyone to pray for a natural gas pipeline, which she said was God’s will. And today, God said, "Hey lady, I don't deal with oil companies. That's more Satan's area.'" --Jay Leno

"According to a series of just published letters that Albert Einstein sent to his second wife, he had ten mistresses. He would send his wife letters about his mistresses and then ask her for advice. Or as Bill Clinton called him, 'a trailblazer, a pioneer.'" --Jay Leno

"A Tomahawk cruise missile fell off a truck in the Bronx this week. A cruise missile, isn't that unbelievable? You know what that means? There are now more weapons of mass destruction in the Bronx than there are in Iraq." --Jay Leno

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

General Tso, I love your chicken/no-room-for-error crisis/So finally some good news

"As if all this news is not bad enough, today, President Bush announced he's on the case. Because if there's one name that comes to mind when you're in a no-room-for-error crisis, it's George Bush." --Bill Maher

"The economy is in big trouble, but the Bush administration is now running it. So finally some good news." --David Letterman

"You can understand why this lawyer fellow let his guard down with Cheney, because if you're out hunting with a politician, you think, 'If I'm going to get it, it's going to be in the back.'" –Craig Ferguson

President Bush arrived in Beijing earlier today. And before stepping out of the plane, he tested the air with a canary. But they got together, the Chinese, and threw a big state dinner for President Bush in his honor. And President Bush, he doesn’t know what he’s doing over there. He turned to the president of China, and he said, 'General Tso, I love your chicken.'" --David Letterman

"A Tomahawk cruise missile fell off a truck in the Bronx this week. A cruise missile, isn't that unbelievable? You know what that means? There are now more weapons of mass destruction in the Bronx than there are in Iraq." --Jay Leno

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

There are now more weapons of mass destruction in the Bronx than there are in Iraq (Lies that led us to war)

"A Tomahawk cruise missile fell off a truck in the Bronx this week. A cruise missile, isn't that unbelievable? You know what that means? There are now more weapons of mass destruction in the Bronx than there are in Iraq." --Jay Leno

"Oh, and he is pissed about the trillion dollar thing. Usually, when Bush spends that kind of money on a country, he gets to bomb the shit out of it, too." --Bill Maher

"When it gets hot, so hot you can't stand it and the steam is rising from your scalp, do you worry about global warming? Well, George Bush is now also worried about global warming, but he has a plan. He's going to invade the sun." --David Letterman

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

There are now more weapons of mass destruction in the Bronx than there are in Iraq

"This was a little frightening. Over the weekend, the Royal Mounted Police up in Canada busted a group of Canadian terrorists -- a Canadian al Qaeda group. About 19 of them. Their motto was: 'Death to America, ey?' The Canadian terrorist group was led by Canadian mastermind, Gordy bin Laden." --David Letterman

"A Tomahawk cruise missile fell off a truck in the Bronx this week. A cruise missile, isn't that unbelievable? You know what that means? There are now more weapons of mass destruction in the Bronx than there are in Iraq." --Jay Leno

"Oh, and he is pissed about the trillion dollar thing. Usually, when Bush spends that kind of money on a country, he gets to bomb the shit out of it, too." --Bill Maher

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #FeeltheBern @justicedems @BrandNew535 #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

Pentagon admitted it's been spying on gay groups (Bronx WMDs)

"The Pentagon admitted it's been spying on gay groups. The Pentagon also admitted that since it's started spying on gay groups, it's been having some weird feelings." --Conan O'Brien

"This was a little frightening. Over the weekend, the Royal Mounted Police up in Canada busted a group of Canadian terrorists -- a Canadian al Qaeda group. About 19 of them. Their motto was: 'Death to America, ey?' The Canadian terrorist group was led by Canadian mastermind, Gordy bin Laden." --David Letterman

"A Tomahawk cruise missile fell off a truck in the Bronx this week. A cruise missile, isn't that unbelievable? You know what that means? There are now more weapons of mass destruction in the Bronx than there are in Iraq." --Jay Leno