Monday, July 30, 2018

The candidate that gives a sh*t about you (throwing Frisbees at Joe Biden)

"Anyway, reports are saying that the White House staff loved Obama’s new dog. But the chief of staff, Rahm Emanuel, is jealous, because until the puppy arrived, he was the cutest little guy in the White House." --Craig Ferguson

"President Obama says his daughters will take care of the dog, but who picks up the dog's poop after the kids go to sleep? Well, that duty will fall on a low-level employee with nothing else to do. Joe Biden's going to be cleaning up." --Craig Ferguson

"Bo arrived just in time, because Sasha and Malia were getting tired of throwing Frisbees at Joe Biden." --Jimmy Fallon

"Bo, that's a great name, although they almost named it after the other dog from the White House, Bill." --Jimmy Fallon “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

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