"The new Senate
report that came out today said there is no evidence that Saddam Hussein had
ties to al Qaeda before we invaded Iraq. Tony Snow, the White House spokesman,
said this is just another partisan attempt to denigrate what administration
officials worked so hard to pull out of their asses." --Bill Maher
"California Governor
Arnold Schwarzenegger's is in trouble because he said Cubans and Puerto Ricans
are hot-blooded. Arnold said, 'Sorry, when I made those comments, I assumed no
one would understand what I was saying'." --Conan O'Brien
"President Bush's new
position on torture is, 'We don't do it. We've never done it. And we're going
to stop doing it.'" --Jay Leno
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