Pretty sure Jesus didn't die to get you ready for bikini season

After last night's New Hampshire primary it looks like Chris Christie is out, which isn't surprising — he doesn't look like the kind of guy who wins a lot of races. –James Corden

Is it possible for a man to be sadder than Jeb Bush? We are a week away from Jeb Bush walking on stage at the debate just wearing sweat pants, eating cereal directly out of the box, and just going, "Oh, what's the point." –James Corden

The real story of last night's primary was John Kasich, who out of nowhere managed to take second place with Republicans. It seems like Kasich's major selling point is that he's not Trump, Cruz, or Jeb. –James Corden

Today is Ash Wednesday, which is the official beginning of Lent. I've noticed a lot of people use Lent as an excuse to diet. They give up things like chocolate or carbs for 40 days and claim it's for religious reasons. Pretty sure Jesus didn't die to get you ready for bikini season. –Jimmy Kimmel