Trump was forced to open a window and start yelling at people on the street (All I can say is, way to go, Wolf Blitzer!)

It’s been reported that a contributor to CNN has been having an affair with Ted Cruz. All I can say is, way to go, Wolf Blitzer! –Conan O’Brien

This morning, Twitter went down for almost an hour. As a result, President Trump was forced to open a window and start yelling at people on the street. --Conan O’Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

All I can say is, way to go, Wolf Blitzer! (figuring out who’s homeless and who’s just in a band)

It’s been reported that a contributor to CNN has been having an affair with Ted Cruz. All I can say is, way to go, Wolf Blitzer! –Conan O’Brien

Portland is planning to offer homeless people a free bus ticket out of town. Of course, the problem in Portland is figuring out who’s homeless and who’s just in a band. –Conan O’Brien

“Yesterday, Mitt Romney told what he thought was a humorous story about how his father closed down a Michigan factory. Then Romney went on to quote some of his favorite funny quotes from the movie ‘Schindler's List.’” –Conan O'Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

All I can say is, way to go, Wolf Blitzer! (Because we told everyone Tina Fey was coming)

It’s been reported that a contributor to CNN has been having an affair with Ted Cruz. All I can say is, way to go, Wolf Blitzer! –Conan O’Brien

"Sarah Palin visited the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem. There was an awkward moment when she said, 'So this is what keeps the Mexicans out?'" –Conan O'Brien

"People are questioning if Ted Cruz can legally run for president because he was born in Canada. And the last thing we want to do is pave the way for a President Bieber." –Conan O'Brien

"On a trip to Israel, Sarah Palin asked the Israelis why they're apologizing all the time. They responded saying, 'Because we told everyone Tina Fey was coming.'" –Conan O'Brien

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

I think the lesson is don't get sick in Texas (It's like Groundhog Day for a**holes)

September 2011

“Wolf Blitzer asked Ron Paul what should we do about someone who is 30 years old, doesn’t have health insurance, and goes into a comma, and might die. And Ron Paul said something about, 'Well, I miss the old days when people just took care of each other.' Well, that’s good news. If you're in Texas and get hit by a bus, a nun will put leeches on your forehead." –Bill Maher

“Between Ron Paul and Rick Perry, I think the lesson is don't get sick in Texas.” –Bill Maher

“Four people in Texas got botulism from black tar heroin. And Michele Bachmann said, ‘Thank God at least it wasn’t a vaccination.” –Bill Maher

“Protecting young girls from cervical cancer? Rick Perry left himself vulnerable to charges of having a tiny speck of humanity, which is very bad for a Republican candidate. So he announced a new policy for Texas. For every child who gets the HPV vaccine, he will execute two Mexicans.” –Bill Maher

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

She'll need a miracle to win. Or a very good spell (She's not really a master debater)

"Sarah Palin and Rush Limbaugh are President Obama's 10th cousins. Which means they are secret Muslims." –Jimmy Kimmel

"Did you watch the debate with Christine O'Donnell, you know, the anti-self pleasuring, witchy candidate in Delaware? She wasn't that good though. She's not really a master debater.'" –Craig Ferguson

"Christine O'Donnell is trailing in the polls by 20 percent. She'll need a miracle to win. Or a very good spell." –Craig Ferguson

"The debate was moderated by Wolf Blitzer. It got very intense. At one point, O'Donnell turned him into an actual wolf." –Craig Ferguson

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

A custom known traditionally as “going out for cigarettes.” (Super Blood Wolf Moon)

Meanwhile, great news for fans of the sky because, this month, we will witness a Super Blood Wolf Moon! And why is this called the Super Blood Wolf Moon? It’s “Super” because it’s at its closest point in orbit, which makes it look bigger. It’s a “Blood Moon” because diffracting light turns it red. And Native Americans named January’s moon the “Wolf Moon” because in winter it would make wolves howl. And not, as I thought, because it is when Wolf Blitzer must slake his thirst for the blood of innocents. Jake Tapper, you’ve been warned. --Stephen Colbert

Meanwhile, great news for people who love progress because a new Saudi Arabia law requires women to be notified if their husbands divorce them to end secret divorces, where Saudi men end a marriage without telling their wives. A custom known traditionally as “going out for cigarettes.” --Stephen Colbert

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Miss Congeniality steps up, I think (It's North Korea! Run!)

"But a lot of public figures do this. And I've tried to do it. Doesn't work. You blame the media. When you have trouble, you blame the media. And today, as a matter of fact, Sarah Palin was up in a helicopter, shooting Wolf Blitzer." --David Letterman

"But I was talking to a lady here in the audience who's from Alaska. And we were wondering about this. How does a thing like this work? Because she steps down and is no longer the governor of Alaska. And we figured it out, the title now is -- Miss Congeniality steps up, I think, -- is now the governor of Alaska. I think so." --David Letterman

"Everybody have a nice, happy Fourth of July? We took Mom to see the fireworks. I thought it was going to be a lot of fun. Every time, a big one goes off, my mom screams, 'It's North Korea! It's North Korea! Run!'" --David Letterman

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

I think we've seen the shortest presidential campaign in history (Incredibly Awkward Social Situation Room)

"Former Vice President Al Gore was nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize. Gore is being honored for his work putting both Arabs and Jews to sleep." --Conan O'Brien

"I want to get back to a subject that we were discussing earlier this week. It was an interview that Wolf Blitzer conducted with our Vice President Cheney, in which Mr. Blitzer brought up how many of the president's conservative supporters are criticizing Cheney's gay daughter's position to have a baby with her life partner. That conversation, of course, taking place in the 'Incredibly Awkward Social Situation Room.'" --Jon Stewart

"Joe Biden, on the day of announcing his candidacy for president of the United States, called Barack Obama 'the first mainstream African-American who is articulate, bright and clean.' I think we've seen the shortest presidential campaign in history." --Jay Leno

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

In the end, this Supreme Court case will be decided by the swing vote, Justice Meat Loaf (And don't tell me your mind's going)

Today, Justice Anthony Kennedy announced he's retiring from the Supreme Court. I never thought I'd say this, but you're only 81! They say 81 is the new 79. And don't tell me your mind's going, because I read "Bush v. Gore" and "Citizens United" — you never had one. --Stephen Colbert

This is a seismic political event, because Kennedy has been the decisive vote in many cases, and his retirement gives Trump the opportunity to fundamentally change the course of the Supreme Court, and I would not trust Trump to fundamentally change the dessert course. Oh, we are supremely screwed. I look forward to Wolf Blitzer in 2021: "In the end, this Supreme Court case will be decided by the swing vote, Justice Meat Loaf." --Stephen Colbert

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

You know what, just kill us now (Breaking some anonymous internet troll's kneecaps)

Today was the annual presidential turkey pardoning at the White House. The president pardoned two turkeys today — and then immediately criticized them on Twitter for not being grateful enough. –James Corden

During the ceremony, Trump tried to make a joke about overturning Obama's pardons from last year, at which point the turkeys in front of Trump were like, "You know what, just kill us now." –James Corden

      

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #JohnHulsecollectedpoems #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

Jimmy Dore Joins Lee Camp To Discuss Why They’re Both Attacked By The Media

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #FeeltheBern @justicedems @BrandNew535

Wolf Blitzer Worries Stopping Killing Kids Would Hurt Profits

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

All I can say is, way to go, Wolf Blitzer!

A conservative radio host told Donald Trump he reminds him of a 12-year-old playground bully. Trump responded by shoving the host and calling him a "gaywad." –Conan O’Brien

Portland is planning to offer homeless people a free bus ticket out of town. Of course, the problem in Portland is figuring out who’s homeless and who’s just in a band. –Conan O’Brien

Nabisco, the maker of Oreos and Chips Ahoy, is planning to announce hundreds of layoffs. So apparently, we legalized marijuana for nothing. –Conan O’Brien

It’s been reported that a contributor to CNN has been having an affair with Ted Cruz. All I can say is, way to go, Wolf Blitzer! –Conan O’Brien

I think the lesson is don't get sick in Texas

“Wolf Blitzer asked Ron Paul what should we do about someone who is 30 years old, doesn’t have health insurance, and goes into a comma, and might die. And Ron Paul said something about, 'Well, I miss the old days when people just took care of each other.' Well, that’s good news. If you're in Texas and get hit by a bus, a nun will put leeches on your forehead." –Bill Maher



“Between Ron Paul and Rick Perry, I think the lesson is don't get sick in Texas.” –Bill Maher



“Four people in Texas got botulism from black tar heroin. And Michele Bachmann said, ‘Thank God at least it wasn’t a vaccination.” –Bill Maher



Michele Bachmann won Miss Crazyality

"Mitt Romney said that President Obama, does not understand that the president doesn't create jobs. Then Romney went on to explain his plan to create jobs once he's elected president." –Jay Leno



"Since Rick Perry has been governor of Texas, 234 criminals have been executed. That's the difference between Texas and California: In California, those criminals would have been given tryouts for the Raiders." –Jay Leno 



"The economy is so bad that in Texas Rick Perry had to execute convicts just by throwing a toaster in the bath tub! That's how bad." –Jay Leno



"The moderators of the Republican debate were Wolf Blitzer and Larry the Cable Guy. Rick Santorum won the swimsuit competition. Michele Bachmann won Miss Crazyality." –Jimmy Kimmel  

John Hulse painting