Hey, maybe they know where Hillary's emails are?

It is now being reported that the Democratic National Committee was hacked by the Russians. Hey, maybe they know where Hillary's emails are. –Stephen Colbert

While they were in the DNC cyber matrix, the Russians apparently stole opposition research on Donald Trump. Russia, what are you doing? If you want damaging information about Donald Trump, just wait for him to talk. –Stephen Colbert

Last night, the last primary was held in Washington, D.C. The primaries being over reminds me what my brother used to say when I was a kid: "I'm going to keep punching you in the face but it will feel so good when it's over." –Stephen Colbert