why not go nuts?

"Yesterday in Iraq, after Saddam Hussein was found guilty, there was celebratory gunfire in the streets. Unfortunately, it couldn't be heard over the regular gunfire." --Conan O'Brien

"Saddam Hussein couldn't have been more pleased. The death by hanging sentence was a plea bargain. It was knocked down from the standard sentence for crimes against humanity, which is beheading, re-heading, a semi-lethal injection coupled with an electrocution, a 15-minute time-out to think about what you've done and then they give you Lou Gehrig's disease." --Daily Show correspondent John Oliver, on Saddam Hussein's reaction to his death sentence

"Reverend Ted Haggard, president of the 30 million member National Association of Evangelicals, resigned his post this weekend after admitting to a three-year relationship with a gay hooker. Oh, and he also used and purchased crystal meth. Because if you're the head of a gay-hating organization and you're having a gay affair, why not go nuts?" --Jon Stewart