"The Fox network has a
brand new show on Sunday nights. It's called, 'When Presidents Attack.' Did you
see that? Former President Clinton lashed out at reporter Chris Wallace the
other night on Fox News. When questioned about Osama bin Laden, Clinton said he
tried to kill bin Laden. I believe him, but we all know what bad aim Bill Clinton
has." --Jay Leno
"After three long
years, our efforts in Iraq have been successful in fostering a new generation
of people who hate us." --Jon Stewart
"A new National
Intelligence Estimate report recently leaked to the New York Times says the war
in Iraq has made the overall terrorism problem worse, and has spread Islamic
radicalism further than before. Now that sounds bad, but remember, this is from
a U.S. intelligence report. Take it with a grain of salt." --Jon Stewart
"The president of
Afghanistan says over the past year, democracy has suffered a set back in his
country. On the bright side, at least now he and President Bush have something
in common." --Jay Leno
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