That unborn child is Luke Skywalker (Let's be positive here!)

"A flight attendant was fired from Virgin Airlines for placing a baby in an overhead compartment. To be fair, the baby did not fit under the seat." –Conan O'Brien

"I'm upset that friend of the show Mike Huckabee criticized Natalie Portman for having a child out of wedlock. Listen, I'm no fan of unwed mothers either, but this is Natalie Portman we're talking about. That unborn child is Luke Skywalker." –Conan O'Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Those were televised?! (smiling her way through the inauguration)

Oscar nominations were announced today with Meryl Streep

nominated for “Florence Foster Jenkins,” Natalie Portman for

“Jackie,” and Hillary Clinton for smiling her way through the

inauguration. –Seth Meyers

According to reports, President Trump and some of his allies have

raised the possibility that Rudy Giuliani should do fewer television

interviews following his recent appearances. Replied Giuliani,

"Those were televised?! --Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

How Joe Biden Launched a New Prison Boom (That unborn child is Luke Skywalker)

"I'm upset that friend of the show Mike Huckabee criticized Natalie Portman for having a child out of wedlock. Listen, I'm no fan of unwed mothers either, but this is Natalie Portman we're talking about. That unborn child is Luke Skywalker." –Conan O'Brien

 New research says that Neanderthals used to relieve pain by chewing on a plant containing the main ingredient in aspirin. Or as that’s now being called, “the Republican healthcare plan.” –Conan O’Brien

"A flight attendant was fired from Virgin Airlines for placing a baby in an overhead compartment. To be fair, the baby did not fit under the seat." –Conan O'Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Those were televised?! (digital protest art)

According to reports, President Trump and some of his allies have raised the possibility that Rudy Giuliani should do fewer television interviews following his recent appearances. Replied Giuliani, "Those were televised?! --Seth Meyers

Openly gay Democratic mayor Pete Buttigieg announced this morning that he has launched an exploratory committee for a possible presidential run, much to the dismay of Mike Pence, who believes being exploratory is a sin. --Seth Meyers

Oscar nominations were announced today with Meryl Streep nominated for “Florence Foster Jenkins,” Natalie Portman for “Jackie,” and Hillary Clinton for smiling her way through the inauguration. –Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

If the measure passes the city could be solvent within 45 minutes (That unborn child is Luke Skywalker)

"Arnold Schwarzenegger has been offered a role in a sequel to 'The Terminator.' In this one he travels back in time and kills the person who suggested he run for Governor." –Conan O'Brien

"Today residents of L.A. are voting on a tax on anything sold in a medical marijuana dispensary. If the measure passes the city could be solvent within 45 minutes." –Conan O'Brien

"I'm upset that friend of the show Mike Huckabee criticized Natalie Portman for having a child out of wedlock. Listen, I'm no fan of unwed mothers either, but this is Natalie Portman we're talking about. That unborn child is Luke Skywalker." –Conan O'Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

To be fair, the baby did not fit under the seat (That unborn child is Luke Skywalker)

"I'm upset that friend of the show Mike Huckabee criticized Natalie Portman for having a child out of wedlock. Listen, I'm no fan of unwed mothers either, but this is Natalie Portman we're talking about. That unborn child is Luke Skywalker." –Conan O'Brien

“Mitt Romney is having a lot of trouble connecting to the common person. So he’s trying a little too hard. In an interview yesterday, Romney said that he has worn a garbage bag as rain gear. He said it’s easy. All he had to do is dump out the hundred-dollar bills and throw the bag over his head.” –Conan O'Brien

"A flight attendant was fired from Virgin Airlines for placing a baby in an overhead compartment. To be fair, the baby did not fit under the seat." –Conan O'Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

It's fun to finally be working on a problem that I didn't cause (That unborn child is Luke Skywalker)

"President Obama and the First Lady attended a parent-teacher conference, and when they left, President Obama didn't look very happy. Apparently Joe Biden's being held back a grade." –Craig Ferguson

"I'm upset that friend of the show Mike Huckabee criticized Natalie Portman for having a child out of wedlock. But this is Natalie Portman we're talking about. That unborn child is Luke Skywalker." –Conan O'Brien 

"This week, President Bush announced he's launching a new campaign to solve the conflict between the Israelis and the Palestinians. When asked why, Bush said, 'It's fun to finally be working on a problem that I didn't cause.'" --Conan O'Brien

"I was watching the news on television earlier, and George Bush says the economy is in danger. Nothing gets past this guy! Wow! Like a steel trap." --David Letterman

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

It could get a little awkward if... (Nah, Jamal is doin' 30 months for jaywalking)

"Republican Presidential hopeful Mike Hucka-BS is attacking actress Natalie Portman for getting pregnant without being married. It could get a little awkward if he runs into Sarah and Bristol Palin at Fox News." –Jay Leno

"President Bush has commuted Scooter Libby ‘s sentence because he felt that 30 months in jail for four felonies was way too harsh, so he reduced it a little. Back to nothing, zero. See, that's called the rich white guy reduction. See, that's 'cause his name's Scooter. There's not a lot of guys named Jamal gettin' that deal. Nah, Jamal is doin' 30 months for jaywalking." --Jay Leno

"Donald Rumsfeld is writing a book about the war in Iraq. To give you an idea of how accurate this book is, it never ends. It's 80,000 pages." --Jay Leno

"But David Vitter says he's not going to talk about his use of prostitutes out of respect for his wife, that's what he said today. It's all these guys getting caught with hookers, they have this newfound respect for their wife. Ya know something, when his pants were down around his ankles leaving the motel, I don't see him going 'you know, I love my wife.' Well you know what makes it especially hypocritical: apparently Vitter has been a strong opponent of same-sex marriage, but today he explained that too. Apparently he's against having sex with the person you're married to." --Jay Leno

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

That unborn child is Luke Skywalker (the last voyage of the Space Shuttle)

"I'm upset that friend of the show Mike Huckabee criticized Natalie Portman for having a child out of wedlock. But this is Natalie Portman we're talking about. That unborn child is Luke Skywalker." –Conan O'Brien

"This is the last voyage of the Space Shuttle, and President Obama called them in space today: 'You're not going to believe what's happening with Charlie Sheen down here.'" –Conan O'Brien

"Arnold Schwarzenegger has been offered a role in a sequel to 'The Terminator.' In this one he travels back in time and kills the person who suggested he run for Governor." –Conan O'Brien

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

And when she has her glasses on, Todd doesn't know she's Superman (It's like Inception for hillbillies)

"New Rule: When you make stupid into an art form, it's not stupid anymore. We just found out that the "Sarah Palin" who writes Sarah Palin's Facebook page is a fake, but the real Sarah Palin has her own Facebook page, under a fake name. And sometimes the real/fake Sarah Palin praises the work of the fake/real Sarah Palin. It's like Inception for hillbillies. There's also a rumor that she doesn't really need glasses, she just wears them to look smart. And when she has them on, Todd doesn't know she's Superman.” –Bill Maher

"One interviewer said, are you bi-polar? He said, 'I'm bi-winning. I win here and I win there.' So yes, it's childish. It's needlessly defensive. It makes no sense. So if you ever wondered what it would be like if Sarah Palin was on coke, there you go." –Bill Maher, on Charlie Sheen

"Republican Presidential hopeful Mike Hucka-BS is attacking actress Natalie Portman for getting pregnant without being married. It could get a little awkward if he runs into Sarah and Bristol Palin at Fox News." –Jay Leno

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

JOKES: So if you want to live here, you’ll just have to learn to speak Russian

Following President Trump’s inauguration, the White House website no longer has an option for translation into Spanish. So, sorry, Mexican immigrants, if you want to live here, you’ll just have to learn to speak Russian. –Seth Meyers

President Trump today met with the leaders of Fiat, Chrysler, Ford, and General Motors. And he asked them one question, “How many people do you think were at my inauguration?” –Seth Meyers

Oscar nominations were announced today with Meryl Streep nominated for “Florence Foster Jenkins,” Natalie Portman for “Jackie,” and Hillary Clinton for smiling her way through the inauguration. –Seth Meyers

In the respectful and post-feminist desire to see their naked boobies

"Republican Presidential hopeful Mike Hucka-BS is attacking actress Natalie Portman for getting pregnant without being married. It could get a little awkward if he runs into Sarah and Bristol Palin at Fox News." –Jay Leno

"In some countries Women's Day is a national holiday and men give women flowers. In America Women's Day falls on another holiday, Mardi Gras, where men give women beads in the respectful and post-feminist desire to see their naked boobies." –Craig Ferguson



"I'm upset that friend of the show Mike Huckabee criticized Natalie Portman for having a child out of wedlock. Listen, I'm no fan of unwed mothers either, but this is Natalie Portman we're talking about. That unborn child is Luke Skywalker." –Conan O'Brien