Bush said Mary Cheney would make a fine mom and a darn good dad, too.

"Yesterday, President Bush delivered his annual Kwanzaa message. The president said let's remember that Kwanzaa only exists because a guy named Kwan died for our sins." --Conan O'Brien

"Time Magazine has named everyone their 'Person of the Year.' And somehow, Al Gore still came in second." --Jay Leno

"Well, big announcement today from Senator Hillary Clinton. She now says that she wouldn't have voted to authorize President Bush's attack on Iraq if she knew what she knows now. She wouldn't have married Bill if she knew what she knows now." --Jay Leno

"Well, President Bush said this week that Mary Cheney the lesbian daughter that's pregnant would make a fine mom and a darn good dad, too." --Jay Leno