Fox News: Not racist, but #1 with Racists (we hate you long time)

"President Bush said he is now listening to Democrats in a new way -- without wiretaps." --Jay Leno

"Disgraced lobbyist Jack Abramoff reported to prison today for his six-year term for bribing members of Congress. Here is the ironic part -- on his first day in prison, he ran into more congressmen than he did when he was on Capitol Hill." --Jay Leno

 "The Marine Corps' Toys for Tots program started today. Former Congressman Mark Foley got a little confused. You see, he went down there and thought he could trade some toys for tots." --Jay Leno

"President Bush just began a seven-day trip through Asia. So far, everywhere he's gone in Asia he's been met by thousands of protesters. President Bush may be the first American to be greeted with the phrase, 'We hate you long time.'" --Conan O'Brien