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Showing posts with label MSNBC. Show all posts
Showing posts with label MSNBC. Show all posts

Monday, April 20, 2026

11 of America's smartest scientists have suddenly died or vanished (it's good to know Joe Biden will be in a better place)


So far, 11 of America's smartest scientists have suddenly died or vanished. No wonder Mika keeps telling everyone that Joe Scarborough’s a brilliant scientist. —Greg Gutfeld


Well, it appears women are getting boob jobs from injectable filler made from donated cadaver fats. Hey, it's good to know Joe Biden will be in a better place. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Monday, April 6, 2026

I'm willing to bet Big Government feels it's biggest when it's inside your... (If Not Now, When?)


"Here's the detail I found most interesting: all the television sets must be tuned to Fox News. Wow! Because god forbid he walks into a hotel room, and the TV is on another channel, and he finds out what a sh---y job he's been doing. He's got to avoid not just CNN and MSNBC, I think Animal Planet is doing stories on that now. There was one other detail on the bottom of the rider, it was handwritten and somewhat cryptic. He also requests a rifle, some ammo and an old man's face." --Jon Stewart, on Dick Cheney's hotel suite demands


"The Supreme Court ruling that anyone who's arrested -- even accidentally -- can be strip-searched was decided five to four, with the votes for the searches coming from the Court's five conservatives. You know -- the 'defending personal liberty' guys. Which is weird because I'm not a constitutional scholar, but I'm willing to bet Big Government feels it's biggest when it's inside your anus." –Jon Stewart


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”



 

Saturday, March 21, 2026

an extra hour to fake a headache (they want to be the hot one)


In a recent interview, Whoopi Goldberg said her sex life is mostly hit and runs. Here's how it works. She hits a man with a car and then has sex with them before they can run away. —Greg Gutfeld


MS Now is reducing Morning Joe from 4 hours to three. Which means Mika has an extra hour to fake a headache. —Greg Gutfeld

A poll revealed that when it comes to women picking female friends, the top qualities they value are grit, humor, and intelligence. In other words, they want to be the hot one. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Monday, December 29, 2025

What's the only job worse than disposing of nuclear waste? (and cross it deliberately)


Minnesota’s Mall of America has hired its first-ever black Santa Claus. Which sounds like a big deal until you realize that in Minnesota, I’m considered black. –Conan O’Brien


According to MSNBC Britney Spears recently hired a person to keep an eye on Kevin Federline 24 hours a day. Which answers the question: what's the only job worse than disposing of nuclear waste. --Conan O’Brien 5/4/2006

According to the latest poll California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger’s approval rating is down to 30%. After hearing this Arnold said I'm not gonna act all hurt and upset because I don't have that kind of range. --Conan O’Brien 11/10/2005


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”



 

Wednesday, November 19, 2025

I thought Brian Stelter worked at CNN (you should see where he stuffs the candles)


Joy Reid said when she worked at MSNBC, she'd go to the gym and there'd be someone naked in the locker room who had boobies drooping to their knees. What? I thought Brian Stelter worked at CNN. —Greg Gutfeld


A Swedish man set a Guinness World Record by stuffing 81 matches up his nose. Even more impressive, you should see where he stuffs the candles. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Sunday, October 5, 2025

the omelet station at Mar-a-Lago (an attack on every American)


“Democrats want Republicans to agree to continue funding the Affordable Care Act, whereas Republicans want to use that money to add crab legs to the omelet station at Mar-a-Lago.” — Jimmy Kimmel

“And Trump is threatening to make ‘irreversible cuts' if there’s a shut down, which — you know what? I was recently the victim of a government shutdown. They are reversible, I will tell you that.” — Jimmy Kimmel


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Saturday, September 27, 2025

Mommy, is that the lady who k***** Jeffrey Epstein? (That guy does nothing)


Hillary Clinton told Morning Joe that Americans have to stop finger pointing, especially kids who point at her and say, "Mommy, is that the lady who killed Jeffrey Epstein?” —Greg Gutfeld


President Trump hung an official picture of Joe Biden's auto pen at the White House. If you think that's bad, he replaced Bill Clinton’s picture with a picture of a cigar. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Saturday, September 6, 2025

It'll be right next to Bill Clinton's Tide to Go stain remover (Let us pray)


Nancy Mace was seen crying after leaving a meeting with Epstein victims. Jerry Nadler also left the meeting crying because there wasn't a cheese tray. —Greg Gutfeld

An MSNBC pundit trashed Trump's DC crime crackdown until old social media posts revealed that she was lamenting having one car, two scooters, and three bikes stolen. Yeah, she tried to walk back her comments, but someone stole her shoes. —Greg Gutfeld

President Trump reportedly plans to unveil a portrait of Biden's auto pen at a new presidential wall of fame. It'll be right next to Bill Clinton's Tide to Go stain remover. —Greg Gutfeld

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Thursday, August 21, 2025

But others believe it stands for Miserable Sh*t No One Watches (they'll get half of that back in bottle returns)


Later this year MSNBC will become MS NOW. The say the new acronym means My Source for News Opinion On the World. But others believe it stands for Miserable Sh*t No One Watches. —Greg Gutfeld 

The Democratic Party's finances are in trouble after spending $15 million to pay off Kamla's campaign, but at least they'll get half of that back in bottle returns. —Greg Gutfeld

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Tuesday, June 17, 2025

then maybe walk around the neighborhood till you calm down (two bonus minutes)


It started with Trump’s plan to turn the air traffic control functions of the FAA into a nonprofit corporation. Although, to be fair, any company Trump runs is eventually nonprofit. –Stephen Colbert


If you remember a few weeks ago the democrats proposed a $1 Trillion infrastructure deal, and Trump said, “Why not $2 Trillion?” So they said Okay. Today was just supposed to be hammering out the details, but it didn’t work out that way. Trump walked in, didn’t shake anyone’s hand or take a seat, and left before anyone else could speak. All told, it was over in three minutes. According to Stormy Daniels that’s two bonus minutes. --Stephen Colbert


This week Denver became the first city to decriminalize hallucinogenic mushrooms. This is going to change their whole approach to tourism. “Denver: Come stare at the wood grain on the door, then maybe walk around the neighborhood till you calm down.” --Stephen Colbert


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”



 

Saturday, May 17, 2025

A lucid and well-informed examination of the world's problems (so I guess you're out of luck Chris Hayes)


Cops found what appeared to be a human leg bone near Taylor Swift’s beachside mansion. I guess the bone and the rest of the body are never ever ever getting back together. —Greg Gutfeld 


Halle Berry says she's not sure if a woman should ever play James Bond, so I guess you're out of luck Chris Hayes. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Friday, May 9, 2025

You're on the Commie list now (they are getting more and more desperate for viewers)


On a recent podcast Simon Cowell said he once turned down a couple's offer of $150,000 to watch them have sex. Wow, Morning Joe are getting more and more desperate for viewers. —Greg Gutfeld


A new poll Colombia was voted the country with the most beautiful women in the world. But come on, any woman looks beautiful when there might be cocaine up her butt. —Greg Gutfeld


Tensions between India and Pakistan are still on the rise. As a result the rest of the world fears they will have nowhere to turn for tech support. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Thursday, April 24, 2025

Well that makes one of us (to be continued...)


Secretary of Health and Human Services RFK Jr said the FDA will soon remove eight harmful dyes from the US food supply. They also plan to ban whatever the hell is in George Clooney’s hair. —Greg Gutfeld 


Morning Joe’s Joe Scarboro told Elon Musk quote "It's time to get back to your day job due to Tesla's stock dropping," adding "He's getting pounded." "Well that makes one of us," said Mika Brzezinski. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Wednesday, April 16, 2025

In fact the tremors were so strong... (comes in to get a Brazilian)


A 5.2 magnitude earthquake shook Southern California. In fact the tremors were so strong a crack was found in Nancy Pelosi's face. —Greg Gutfeld


An MSNBC analyst claimed that Donald Trump wants to take anyone in America and disappear them, presumably by booking them as an analyst on MSNBC. —Greg Gutfeld


The Department of Imaginary Concerns. It's the same department that brought you Russian collusion, the climate apocalypse, trans kids, plastic straws and now add the effects of tariffs on the “manosphere”. It's the lefty way of condemning tariffs while pretending to care about men. Men who've already fled your party like waxers when Joy Behar comes in to get a Brazilian. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Thursday, April 3, 2025

It could be on a network people watch (Speak and Spell)


Toward the end of his presidency Joe Biden was so demented he couldn’t debate a Speak and Spell, which is why they told him the Speak and Spell was the nuclear football. —Greg Gutfeld


Joe Scarboro covered up for Biden’s decline so badly that if he got within 200 feet of a polygraph machine it would burst into flames. But Scarboro couldn't afford to be honest with his audience because the Dems had a big bad orange man breathing down their necks, so he had to deny Biden's physical and mental decline which the whole world saw every day. He had to blurt out hostile fidgety bull**** or they wouldn't give him the pills that keep him from turning into a werewolf. Scarboro’s entire grift was so that he could be the last person MSNBC lays off. I mean it's not like his night job as a Beavis and Butthead impersonator would cover his monthly nut, but now in 2025 when he thinks it’s safe Scarboro has seen the light. The funny thing is if you had just told the truth when it mattered maybe the Dems would have had time to find a candidate who could actually win an election. But Scarboro didn’t tell the truth so now you have to lie about your lies. But hey, it could always be worse. Morning Joe could be on a network people watch. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Monday, March 31, 2025

This guy's skull is emptier than a theater showing Snow White (At least she had a pulse)


So who killed the legacy media? Well it turns out it was a mass suicide and Joe Biden was their Jim Jones. According to excerpts from an upcoming book obtained by The Guardian, Democratic officials were drawing up plans to replace Biden as early as January of 2023, in the event he no longer had the ability to run, and by that they mean dead.


In Fight: Inside the Wildest Battle for the White House, authors Jonathan Allen and Amie Parnes claim that aids to Kamala Harris quote, “strategized around the possibility that Biden might die in office” and apparently Kamala’s  Comm's director went so far as to write a death pool roster of federal judges who might swear her in if Biden indeed kicked the bucket. They also had a team of coroners standing by who could list Joe's time of death as something besides, who the F knows? It could have been anywhere from 2017 to 2011. Who's counting?


The authors also detail other instances of Joe falling apart. During the campaign at a donor's reception just days after the disastrous presidential debate, Biden aids put fluorescent tape on the carpet to show the president where to walk. It's similar to how Bill Clinton's team laid out a path using copies of Hustler magazine.


Biden was often tailed by staffers since he did have a tendency to you know wander off. I bet they likely had another team nearby ready to make a chalk outline. According to one veteran operative nobody was crazy about running Kamala for president either, but quote "At least she had a pulse." I know, talk about a low bar, where judging by her own behavior she pulled up a stool and started doing shots.


So at the same time that the White House and their mouthpieces like Joe Scarboro were telling the world Biden was more vigorous than ever, they were planning for his imminent demise. But you can't blame Scarboro for getting it wrong. He's had years of Mika saying he's the best she ever had. 


Of course the media seems shocked by this news, but shocking to whom? None of this is surprising to anyone who unlike Joe, had a brain. Not to pat our own backs but we've been telling you this all along. This guy's skull is emptier than a theater showing Snow White. 


And we were all smeared for speaking the truth that was clearly on display for years, and now these same jackasses are telling us that the Signal app story is a grave concern when they hid the fact that Biden was literally a concern for the grave. 


There has to be a penalty for this cover up. The scandal isn't that they elected a vegetable, it's that journalists knew it and refused to act like journalists even as the facts got worse, and that penalty should be a complete loss of credibility, not just now but forever. —Greg Gutfeld


 

Saturday, March 15, 2025

it's on the reduced for quick sale table next to dented cans of green beans (and Tony Soprano demands you call him Tina)


Lawrence O’Donnell of MSNBC said that he needed a break after covering the first 52 days of Donald Trump’s presidency. It’s kind of amazing though that an anchor would admit on TV that he's taking a break from doing his job. Especially since MSNBC's lost so much value it's on the reduced for quick sale table next to dented cans of green beans. But maybe it's because Larry's finally sweating. He went from lying about a dead president to lying about a real one. But when asked to tell the truth the Legacy Media reacts like a vampire getting a holy water enema. —Greg Gutfeld


The left is like the mafia except the food sucks and Tony Soprano demands you call him Tina. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.” 


 

Friday, March 7, 2025

Even Rachel Maddow thinks that's a good number (Let that sink in)


According to a CNN poll, that's right CNN, 69% had a positive reaction to President Trump’s speech. 69! Even Rachel Maddow thinks that's a good number. —Greg Gutfeld


No wonder all the sane Dems are depressed. John Fetterman summed the dem's behavior up on Tuesday as, “A sad cavalcade of self- owns and unhinged petulance. It only makes Trump look more presidential and restrained.” Yeah, and Fetterman is the guy who would wear sweats and a hoodie to a funeral. —Greg Gutfeld


Bottom line, Trump Derangement Syndrome became Trump Derangement Strategy, and by taking over the party it forced them to come out against everything Trump was for which as it turned out was everything the American public was for. So it left the Dems with nothing but hate. So I do wish the Dem's luck who are trying to rid themselves of the craziest angriest people in their party. But if you had listened to me three years ago and not the weepy Jimmy Kimmel’s of the world, you wouldn't be in this mess. You're a brain dead party which serves you right for electing a brain dead president. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Sunday, March 2, 2025

He would have said more but he had to clear the dishes from her table (a tractor trailer carrying frozen curly fries)


In Maine, a tractor trailer carrying frozen curly fries caught fire on the highway. Crap, now I need a new tractor trailer said JB Pritzker. —Greg Gutfeld


Don Lemon told Megan Kelly to go F herself after seeing her reaction to Joy Reid's firing. He would have said more but he had to clear the dishes from her table. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”