Pointy! They're like a triangle (Shalom Amigos)

"President Obama gave a big historic speech yesterday in Egypt. President Obama impressed listeners by beginning his speech with the traditional Islamic greeting, "Salaam Aleikum." Yea, it's very cool. Yea it was especially impressive because a year ago, President Bush opened with 'Shalom Amigos.'" --Conan O'Brien

"President Obama's continuing his world tour. Yesterday he was in Egypt, did you see that? He visited the Pyramids of Giza. And he called them 'awe-inspiring.' That was an improvement over President Bush's tour of the pyramids. He called them 'pointy. They're like a triangle.'" --Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

He's going to the hoosegow for outing Valerie Plame as a CIA agent (an opportunity to discover Islam)

"Earlier today, a federal judge sentenced  Scooter Libby to 30 months in prison for lying. I believe prison is not the place to be when your nickname is Scooter." --Jay Leno

"Lewis Scooter Libby, former chief of staff to Vice President Cheney, is going to the hoosegow for outing Valerie Plame as a CIA agent. Scooter Libby's getting a 30-month sentence and a $250,000 fine and, of course, an opportunity to discover Islam." --Jon Stewart

A magisterial collection.

An emotional roller coaster.

Soon to be a cult classic.

A combination of Bukowski’s

Last Night On Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

Afghanistan's biggest real estate agency (Century 12)

"Now the real Bin Laden, he made a video, it came out today. He's up there with Kanye West and 50 Cent, he's going for that 9/11 market. But in Bin Laden's video, the real Bin Laden said if Americans want the war in Iraq to end, they must convert to Islam. Well, I mean, between that and waiting for the Democrats to end it, I say go with Islam." --Bill Maher

"Obviously Bin Laden follows the news over here, because he said Americans are reeling from a mortgage crisis, which is true. People don't know this, Bin Laden used to work for Afghanistan's biggest real estate agency: Century 12." --Bill Maher

      

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #books #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

In the book, there's three chapters about Bush (Pass It On)

"In this new video, Osama bin Laden makes a pitch to America by attacking the Democrats. And then he says we should all convert to Islam 'cause there are no taxes. He's now running third in Iowa. Is it me or is bin Laden getting more Western in these videos? Like in this new one where he wants us to convert to Islam, he says if you act now, he'll throw in a free prayer rug." --Jay Leno

"Rosie O'Donnell also has a brand new book. In the book, there's three chapters about Bush, and there's another one about the president." --David Letterman

     

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #books #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

Marmaduke came out against stem cell research (Bush comics)

"I'm sure you know by know Muslim groups are outraged and are rioting over cartoons that are appearing in European newspapers that they say are offensive. Now they have attacked something very important to President Bush. The comics." --Jay Leno

"They're boycotting Danish products in the Muslim world. Luckily, not too many mosques are made out of Legos." --Jay Leno

"You've all heard a controversial Danish cartoon, still sparking protests with Muslim fundamentalists, because they claim the cartoon defames Islam. And folks, if that weren't bad enough, today Marmaduke came out against stem cell research." --Conan O'Brien

the two years Tom Brokaw worked in a skirt and heels (al Qaeda video)

"Al Qaeda has released another video. This is rather strange. It features a 28-year-old American named Adam Pearlman from Orange County, California. Who is in al Qaeda? How crazy is that? Finally, an American takes a job away from somebody overseas, and it's in al Qaeda." --Jay Leno

"Have you seen the video? The guy's wearing a white robe and a white turban, and he's demanding that all Americans convert to Islam. That shows you how backwards al Qaeda is right there. I mean, who wears white after Labor Day?." --Jay Leno

"Next week Katie Couric begins as the anchor of the 'CBS Evening News.' Katie is the first solo female anchor. Pretty good if you don't count the two years Tom Brokaw worked in a skirt and heels." --David Letterman

They would even miss sex if that were an option

President Obama gave a speech this afternoon in which he angrily called out Republicans for being too obsessed with his refusal to use the term "radical Islam" — or as Fox News reported it, "Angry Black Man Spotted Talking About Radical Islam Near Capitol Building." –Seth Meyers

Happy birthday to Donald Trump, who turns 70 years old today. And this is cool — so did his views on immigration. –Seth Meyers

A recent study found that 67% of gamers will miss sleep in order to keep playing video games. They would even miss sex if that were an option. –Seth Meyers

I'm going some of the way, then I'll go home.

Anthropologists have released more information about a recently discovered extinct human species. We're finding out all this really cool stuff. They say the species lived in trees, had brains the size of an orange, and plans to vote for Donald Trump for president. –Conan O’Brien

Donald Trump recently said, "I'm going all the way and I'm going to win." And Mike Huckabee said, "I'm going some of the way, then I'll go home." –Conan O’Brien

U.S. officials have been wondering why, according to photos, ISIS seems to have so many Toyotas. One clue seems to be ISIS's credo, "Fanatical about Islam, sensible about gas mileage." –Conan O’Brien