That's like asking Charlie Sheen to define monogamy (And 3 voted fabulous)

"Big vote in the Senate yesterday. They voted down the gay marriage ban. It was a very close vote. 43 voted 'yea.' 44 voted 'nay.' And 3 voted 'fabulous.'" --David Letterman

"The Senate has rejected the gay marriage ban. When you think about it, do you really want Congress defining marriage? That's like asking Charlie Sheen to define monogamy." --Jay Leno

"The anti-gay marriage amendment: The president endorsed it. The Senate discussed it. I'm pretty sure Jerry Falwell masturbated to it." --Jon Stewart