"A lot of people were
offended by President Bush using a four-letter word at the G-8 Summit the other
day. Were you offended? I was more offended by the way he eats a buttered roll
in front of company." --Jay Leno
"At the end of last
night's 'American Idol,' Ryan Seacrest announced that more than 63 million
votes were cast, which is more than any president in U.S. history has ever
received. In a related story, this morning Hillary Clinton bought a karaoke
machine." --Conan O'Brien
"Iranian President
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is trying to win over the American people. It's sort of a PR
campaign. Earlier today, over at the U.N., he was signing baseballs that said,
'I'm sorry I enriched uranium'." --David Letterman
"According to a new
survey, Hillary Clinton's popularity rating is down to its lowest point in over
a year. When Bill Clinton heard this, he said, 'If there's one thing Hillary
can do, it's bring polls down.'" --Conan O'Brein
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