Kwanzaa only exists because a guy named Kwan died for our sins (Uh oh)

"This sounds like a tabloid story “but according to the Washington Post, former President Bill Clinton has received counseling for sex addiction. I don't think it went too well. Halfway through the first session he talked to his therapist out of her bra and panties. Actually, you know what would cure Bill of his sex addiction? Hillary!" --Jay Leno

"Big changes in Washington. Earlier today, new Secretary of Defense Robert Gates flew to Iraq to get a first-hand look of the situation over there. After surveying the situation, Gates was quoted as saying, 'Uh oh.'" --Conan O'Brien

"Yesterday, President Bush delivered his annual Kwanzaa message. The president said let's remember that Kwanzaa only exists because a guy named Kwan died for our sins." --Conan O'Brien