"Patrick Kennedy blamed his
seemingly intoxicated state after the car crash on his sleeping medication. I
believe it's called Jagermeister." --Jay Leno
"NBC News reported
that CIA Director Porter Goss did not resign. They now say he was fired, and
apparently didn't know it was coming. Which is pretty bad, when you're the head
of the CIA and you didn't know what's coming. He should get fired just for
that." --Jay Leno
"While speaking in
Atlanta on Thursday, Defense Secretary
Donald Rumsfeld was repeatedly interrupted by angry protesters, with one
woman shouting, 'This man needs to be imprisoned for war crimes.' What makes it
worse is that he was speaking at a Rumsfeld family reunion." --Tina Fey
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