This administration is more transparent than the skin stretched across Pelosi's cheekbones (easily exploited)

According according to the Daily Mail, JFK had a secret gay lover. Big deal, so did Michelle Obama. —Greg Gutfeld

President Trump had his first cabinet meeting this week and it was unusual for two reasons. First he actually had a cabinet meeting, the only cabinet Joe Biden ever met with was the one that stored all his medications, and second the whole thing was televised live. This administration is more transparent than the skin stretched across Pelosi's cheekbones. —Greg Gutfeld

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Satan said he tries to avoid American politics because it makes him feel dirty (How conservative is he?)

“How conservative is he? Rick Santorum won't even take soda in the can.” –Jay Leno

“Rick Santorum is so anti-gay, he won't even eat a Hershey bar if it has nuts.” –Jay Leno

“Rick Santorum is conservative; he's so conservative he won't even use a weed whacker. That's how conservative.” –Jay Leno

“In fact, Santorum is so conservative he won't even let the UPS guy handle his package. That's how conservative.” –Jay Leno

“He's so conservative he wants ballpark franks to stop plumping when you cook 'em. That's how conservative.” –Jay Leno

“This guy is really conservative. In fact, Rick Santorum is so conservative he won't even go down on an escalator.” –Jay Leno

"This guy Santorum is very conservative. Rick Santorum is so conservative he won't watch a baseball game because there's a pitcher and a catcher." –Jay Leno

“Rick Santorum's tax returns show that last year, he paid double the tax rate that Mitt Romney paid. Romney is much more clever with the deductions. He writes off poor people.” –Jay Leno

"Santorum says that Satan has his sights set on the United States of America. And today Satan said he tries to avoid American politics because it makes him feel dirty." –Jay Leno

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Finally! A place where we can eat a sandwich! (Still not the clumsiest attempt to get to second base)

A former “Apprentice” contestant says that Donald Trump didn’t know the names of all the women on the show, and would describe them by their bodies and looks. When asked about it, Trump said, “Which woman said that? Brown Hair/Lazy Eye or Blond Hair/Nose Job?” –Jimmy Fallon

The president just signed a law that will require men’s restrooms in federal buildings to have baby-changing tables. Or as most guys will call that, “Finally! A place where we can eat a sandwich!” –Jimmy Fallon

Samsung is sending out thermally insulated “flameproof” boxes for people returning its exploding Galaxy Note 7 phones. Samsung says they’re being “extra cautious,” while UPS is saying, “Please use FedEx.” –Jimmy Fallon

Tonight was game three between the Mets and Dodgers right here at CitiField! But the big story is from Saturday, when Dodgers player Chase Utley slid into second base and injured Rubén Tejada from the Mets. Or as my prom date called it, “Still not the clumsiest attempt to get to second base.” –Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Trump still makes time for his lifelong passion, driving organizations into the ground (Chanel 420)

Donald Trump’s charitable foundation has agreed to dissolve today, amid an ongoing lawsuit about its finances. The lawsuit states that Trump illegally used the charity for his own personal and political benefit. I just think it’s beautiful that even though he’s busy with the presidency, Trump still makes time for his lifelong passion, driving organizations into the ground. --James Corden

I can tell they are frustrated over at UPS. UPS delivers all the presents and Santa gets all the credit. That’s Bull****! --James Corden

Perfume manufacturers are jumping on the marijuana bandwagon. For instance, take a look at this, Chanel 420. --James Corden

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Isn't everybody gay?/UPS drivers/Records are made to be broken (I'm deeply sorry)

"In Iran, homosexuals can be executed for being gay, but only if a homosexual act is witnessed by four other Iranian men. So, they've got four men watching two other men have sex. Isn't everybody gay?" --Jay Leno

"The Iranian president also said there are no lesbians in Iran either. Really? In that whole country, there isn't one whole female UPS driver? I don't think so."  --Jay Leno

"In Utah, polygamy sect leader Warren Jeffs has been convicted. The guy's got 80 wives. 80 wives at the same time. In fact, when Rudy Giuliani heard that, he said, 'Records are made to be broken.'"  --Jay Leno

     

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #books #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

George W. Bush Snake Oil (“flameproof” boxes)

Samsung is sending out thermally insulated “flameproof” boxes for people returning its exploding Galaxy Note 7 phones. Samsung says they’re being “extra cautious,” while UPS is saying, “Please use FedEx.” –Jimmy Fallon

Paris Hilton just bought an $8,000 Chihuahua. How does Paris Hilton still have $8,000? The dog weighs 12 ounces. I’ve eaten hot dogs that weigh more than 12 ounces. That’s not even officially a dog, that’s a hamster; she spent eight grand on a hamster. –Jimmy Kimmel

President Obama is winding down his time in office. He’s got less than 100 days left. But he’s keeping busy, still pushing his agenda, he’s working to fight climate change, he’s shortening sentences for drug offenders, every night he goes down to the basement to visit Merrick Garland, his nominee for the Supreme Court. –Jimmy Kimmel