You said we had a deal! (their new seats only recline forward)

Some news for travelers here. I read that British Airways is getting rid of reclining seats on their planes. And if you think that's bad, Southwest just announced that their new seats only recline forward. --Jimmy Fallon

New polls found that Bernie Sanders is now ahead of Hillary Clinton among Democrats in both Iowa and New Hampshire. And even Hillary's lead in national polls is dwindling. I don't want to say Hillary is upset, but this morning she was spotted shouting into a volcano, "You said we had a deal!" –Jimmy Fallon

Yesterday in Alabama, a bomb squad was called into a post office to handle suspicious bags that ended up being full of hot dogs. So if you know someone who left a bag full of hot dogs at the post office, you should still call the police. -- Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

In that case, forget it. Get me Steven Seagal (He keeps a lot of stuff private)

John McCain actually praised Trump’s new national security adviser, H.R. McMaster, calling him an outstanding choice and a man of genuine intellect, character, and ability. Then Trump said, “In that case, forget it. Get me Steven Seagal.” –Jimmy Fallon

There are rumors that Russia’s compiling a psychological profile on Trump to help Putin get inside his head. You know, it’s so hard to get Trump to open up and talk about himself. He keeps a lot of stuff private. –Jimmy Fallon

Oh, this isn't good. Guys, today, Southwest had to cancel hundreds of flights due to mechanical problems. Yeah, the CEO of Southwest was like, "I'm sorry, but two wings seemed pretty freaking redundant." --Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

You know what? Don't bother (What are we doing wrong here?)

January 2023

“Newly elected Congressman George Santos, is already facing calls to resign because of a growing list of scandals, including lies he's told about his family, education, and his work history. Yep, it's odd when a congressman holds up his right hand to be sworn in, and everyone's like, 'You know what? Don't bother.'” —Jimmy Fallon

“That's right -- last week, Southwest left passengers and luggage across the country stranded after they suffered a major meltdown and canceled more than 15,000 flights. Southwest said that they were launching an investigation into the meltdown, but then they immediately canceled it.” —Jimmy Fallon

“Some movie news. Less than three weeks since its release, Avatar: The Way of Water has already topped $1.4 billion at the global box office. Meanwhile, the Blue Man Group was like, ‘What are we doing wrong here?’” —Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

That’s how many people Donald Trump lost by (Checking the math)

August 2022

Donald Trump keeps saying that he got more votes by far than any sitting president in the history of our country. I know that sounds good but it doesn’t mean much when you lose by 7,o52,770 votes. Let’s do some math. That is more than the entire population of Ireland, plus the entire population of Nebraska combined. Plus a completely sold out stadium in Ann Arbor, plus everyone who works at a Burger King in America, plus every person that an average American will meet in their entire life, plus every major league baseball player and NBA player, plus a Southwest flight at maximum capacity. And throw in every person to date who’s got Monkey Pox in Indiana and there’s still six people left over. That’s the entire Allman Brothers band. That’s how many people Donald Trump lost by. —Al Franken

Checking the math:

Population of Ireland 4,937,786

Population of Nebraska 1,961,504

Michigan Stadium at capacity 107,601

Burger King employees 34,248

People you’ll meet in lifetime 10,000

MLB players 906

NBA players 450

Southwest plane capacity 189

Indiana Monkeypox cases 80

Allman Brothers Band 6

Total: 7,052,770

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”