There are two ways to be fooled (because otherwise it would have been weird)

In a recent interview, Jeb Bush compared Donald Trump to the Kardashians, saying, quote, “The Kardashians wouldn’t exist if we didn’t enjoy watching them.” When asked who his favorite Kardashian is, Jeb said, “Rob – 'cuz he’s the brother nobody wants to talk about.” –Jimmy Fallon

It’s being reported that Donald Trump’s list of running mates is now down to just two people! And they are Chris Christie. –Jimmy Fallon

New documents reveal that when Vincent Van Gogh cut off his ear, the woman he sent it to was a cleaner, not a prostitute as previously thought. You know, because otherwise it would have been weird. –Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Or in other words, Jeb is America’s Preparation H. (Must be nice)

Hillary Clinton had a coughing fit during a speech and the crowd actually chanted her name as she opened a cough drop. She got applause for choking — or as Jeb put it, "Must be nice." –Jimmy Fallon

What is going on with the Republicans? I watch these debates. Trump attacks Cruz. Rubio goes after Bush. Bush gets into a fight with Trump. Remember the good old days when the Republicans were all united against the poor and the minorities? What happened? –Jimmy Fallon

Actually during his speech at the rally, George W. Bush said his brother Jeb is the guy who can fix the problems that inflame our country’s frustrations. Or in other words, Jeb is America’s Preparation H. –Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Some of the most prestigious a**hole factories in America (It requires so little of your time)

Let's get right to the big story. Becky from Full House might go to jail for cheating her kids into college. I have shocking news for everyone here tonight. Rich people cheat and their kids are fucking stupid. 50 people have been charged in this massive scheme to bribe coaches and administration officials so their kids could get into elite colleges, and the schools involved we're talking about Yale, Stanford, Georgetown. Some of the most prestigious asshole factories in America. --Bill Maher

Beto O’Rourke just announced his candidacy for president. That makes 15 democrats running. Trump is already calling them a caravan. --Bill Maher

Not only is atheism not a religion, it's not even my hobby and that's the best thing about being an atheist. It requires so little of your time. --Bill Maher

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

The point of the assassination, was that America never forgets...unless it's slavery (razor blade missiles)

August 2022

“Twenty years after 9/11, the US military has killed the al-Qaida leader Ayman al-Zawahiri by drone as he stood on his balcony at a safe house in Kabul. Goddamn, America clipped the world’s most wanted terrorist off of his safe house balcony? I mean also, at this point, maybe we should stop calling them safe houses. Every terrorist gets killed in a safe house. They should call it ‘a house that you think you’re safe in, but you never know.’” —Trevor Noah

“What’s crazy is that America didn’t just kill him. They killed him with a razor blade missile, which I didn’t even know was a thing. The Hellfire missile is a non-explosive, unmanned weapon which deploys razorblades in flight. The weapons America has sound like things kids just make up on the playground. [imitating a child]: ‘I’m shooting you with a laser-guided missile with razor blades and a shark’s body.’ Meanwhile the CIA is up in a tree being like ‘with a shark’s body, you get that, boys? We gotta go make one of those.’” —Trevor Noah

“When you see stories like this, when you see stories about what America’s capable of, this is where you realize there’s really no excuse for the amount of domestic terrorism in America. Zawahiri, Osama bin Laden’s deputy and successor, lived in a safe house in Kabul and yet America knew what time of day he liked to go out on to his balcony. But when a white supremacist posts on Facebook that he’s gonna murder everyone, and then buys an AR-15, everyone is like ‘Oh, there was no way to stop this!’ The point of the assassination, was that America never forgets … unless it’s slavery. But everything else, America never forgets.” —Trevor Noah

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

The latest excuse for Bush administration foul-ups (That poor Ricky Martin. He just can't catch a break)

 

"President Bush said today canceling [the ports deal] sends a bad message to the Arab world. You know, not like invading their countries, putting them on leashes, making them masturbate, but bad." --Bill Maher

"The big immigration bill is dead for now. Some are saying the Republicans didn't really want this bill because it's really more useful for them to have a wedge issue of illegal aliens, the same way they had gay marriage in 2004. That poor Ricky Martin. He just can't catch a break." --Bill Maher

 

"New rule: You can't be as tired as we are of you. The latest excuse for Bush administration foul-ups is that top members of the White House staff are physically and emotionally exhausted. Hmmm, if there was just some sort of stress-relieving activity that could be performed right there in the Oval Office. I'd suggest a nice vacation out in the country, but the last time that happened, somebody got shot." --Bill Maher

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

America the Beautiful, off key, in mom jeans (eating animal crackers until nearly 9 p.m.)

April 2012

"This week Mitt Romney's Super PAC put out a new ad that tries to ridicule Obama because he was singing Al Green. Let that be a lesson to you aspiring politicians. If you must sing on the campaign trail, make it 'America the Beautiful,' off key, in mom jeans." –Bill Maher

"Mitt Romney swept five more primaries. There was a big Mormon celebration afterward. People were drinking apple juice and eating animal crackers until nearly 9 p.m." –Bill Maher

"It looks like the Republicans are going back to the strategy of 2008 where Obama is characterized as a celebrity. Says the party who worships Ronald Reagan. Come on, you can't worship Ronald Reagan and then attack Obama for being a celebrity. That's like running Chris Christie and saying Obama has a fat ass." –Bill Maher

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s The Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

It's not taxes they hate, it's reading (Kierkegaard on being fooled)

"What a day for the Tea Party people. Did you see that? America’s parks and fairgrounds were lost in a sea of man-boobs. They were venting their anger and rage against taxes, which, of course, in most cases for them went down. Protesting their taxes went down – but you know, why let the truth spoil a perfectly good Klan rally." –Bill Maher

"Federal taxes last year when down for 98 percent of people, but when asked about this, only 12 percent of the Teabaggers thought this was the case. 88 percent of them had it wrong. And a spokesman for the Teabaggers said, 'We don’t want to just be taxed less. We want to be taxed less by a white guy." –Bill Maher

"They used the opportunity on Tax Day to come up with what they call a 'Contract From America.' Remember the 'Contract With America'? Well, this is a different set of 10 completely ridiculous ideas. Like number 4, I'm not kidding about this: 'The tax code cannot have more words than the Constitution.' You know between this and the complaints about the healthcare bill being too long, can we say it? It's not taxes they hate, it's reading." –Bill Maher

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”