"The NRA this week elected a new president, choosing
Alabama lawyer Jim Porter who recently referred to Attorney General Eric Holder
as 'rabidly un-American' and still calls the Civil War the 'War of Northern
Aggression.' He's known around the NRA as 'Reasonable Jim.'" –Seth Meyers
"You
people sound like you're all ready for Cinco de Mayo. I hate it when every holiday
gets so politicized. Like today, the NRA said piñatas should be allowed to
carry guns to defend themselves." –Jay Leno
"George
W. Bush's nephew, George P. Bush, is running for office in Texas. He says P
stands for 'Pretend you've never heard the name George W. Bush." –Conan
O'Brien
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