Donations

Showing posts with label orgy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label orgy. Show all posts

Tuesday, March 24, 2026

Targeting your inner circle (And then I’m thinking a sandwich and a nap)


But this isn’t just a salacious story. National Security experts say that Cindy Yang could pose a threat, presenting opportunities for espionage and blackmail targeting the president’s inner circle. Targeting your inner circle, also available at her massage parlors. --Stephen Colbert


President Trump called us late night talk show hosts untalented and wondered what we were all going to do in 2024 when he’s no longer president. Well, first there’s the parade. Then, there’s the national orgy. And then I’m thinking a sandwich and a nap. --Stephen Colbert


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”



 

Saturday, February 21, 2026

Then, there’s the national orgy (the last time Trump lost a vote this badly he was elected president)


President Trump called us late night talk show hosts untalented and wondered what we were all going to do in 2024 when he’s no longer president. Well, first there’s the parade. Then, there’s the national orgy. And then I’m thinking a sandwich and a nap. --Stephen Colbert


This morning, the Trump administration unveiled their 2018 budget, titled “A New Foundation for American Greatness,” which is just slightly grandiose for a financial document. It’s like calling your grocery list “A Bold Vision for Yogurt and Dog Food.” –Stephen Colbert


Today, the republican held senate rejected Trump’s border emergency declaration 59 to 41. I mean the last time Trump lost a vote this badly he was elected president. --Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”



 

Sunday, January 4, 2026

And you thought the weird part was drugs? (20% for tips)


This week President Trump met with North Korean dictator, and let’s face it, one of his top five closest friends, Kim Jong Un. Talks broke down when the two leaders could not agree on sanctions. Another problem was Kim Jong Un used an interpreter while Trump just spoke English, but louder. --Colin Jost, SNL


And in non-Oscar news, Madison Cawthorn said in a recent interview that 70 year-old republicans invited him to an orgy and did cocaine in front of him. Wait. So you went to the old man orgy? And you thought the weird part was drugs? —Colin Jost


A new study suggests the average man exaggerates the length of their penis by more than 20%. But aren’t you supposed to add 20% for tips. —Colin Jost


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Wednesday, June 25, 2025

I reject your reality... (so whatever you do don't ask about the Magic Johnson)


An ex-girlfriend of Shawn Diddy Combs testified they would use the names of famous NBA players as codes for sex acts. Yeah, so whatever you do don't ask about the Magic Johnson. —Greg Gutfeld


It's so hot in New York City that AOC is going to change her name to AC. —Greg Gutfeld


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Tuesday, January 30, 2024

When home improvement goes wrong (The only catch is that Goofy gets to watch)


A new report shows that since the abortion ban took effect in Texas, the number of teenagers in the state giving birth rose for the first time in fifteen years, which is terrible news for Texas but great news for my new store Michael Che’s Maternity Prom Dresses. —Michael Che

It’s been rumored that Disney World has plans to install a maternity ward inside the magic kingdom so guests can give birth at the park. The only catch is that Goofy gets to watch. —Michael Che

There’s a growing interest in Man Camps where men try to reclaim their masculinity by attending military style boot camps and being berated by drill instructors. But then at night, big gay orgy. —Michael Che

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Saturday, September 23, 2023

It was a great night for O.J.! (Hop of Shame)


President Trump called the invasion of Iraq the "single greatest mistake" in U.S. history. In response, many Americans said, "Well, second greatest." --Conan O’Brien


It’s come out that some species of frogs have sex orgies. These are followed the next morning by the frogs doing the "Hop of Shame." –Conan O’Brien


One of the big winners at last night's Emmys was "The People v. O.J. Simpson." I gotta say, there’s nothing better than checking out the news and hearing, "It was a great night for O.J.!" –Conan O’Brien


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.” 



 

Tuesday, September 19, 2023

It would be a real shame if something happened to your package (And you thought the weird part was drugs?)


And in non-Oscar news, Madison Cawthorn said in a recent interview that 70 year-old republicans invited him to an orgy and did cocaine in front of him. Wait. So you went to the old man orgy? And you thought the weird part was drugs? —Colin Jost


Workers at the Adamson Warehouse in Staten Island voted to become the first Amazon workers in the country to form a Union. The new Union explains Amazon’s new slogan, ‘It would be a real shame if something happened to your package.’ —Colin Jost


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.” 



 

Monday, March 27, 2023

I mean, these people can barely deliver a pizza (Iraq Rememberer)


Today, the republican held senate rejected Donald Trump’s border emergency declaration 59 to 41. I mean the last time Trump lost a vote this badly he was elected president. --Stephen Colbert


President Trump called us late night talk show hosts untalented and wondered what we were all going to do in 2024 when he’s no longer president. Well, first there’s the parade. Then, there’s the national orgy. And then I’m thinking a sandwich and a nap. --Stephen Colbert


One adult video website announced it would donate snow removal services to several cities in the Northeast because it wants to “plow Boston.” Very generous. Very, very generous. I’m not sure I trust the porn industry with city services. I mean, these people can barely deliver a pizza. –Stephen Colbert


https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”



 

Tuesday, June 21, 2022

Apparently, she has never celebrated Halloween in San Francisco (The first rule of Orgy Club is...)

"Tough times all over. Amusement park company Six Flags is filing for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection. Experts say it's due in large part to their money-losing ride, Chrysler Mountain." --Conan O'Brien

"Rep. Michele Bachmann once said that gay people lead a very sad life. Apparently, she has never celebrated Halloween in San Francisco." –Conan O'Brien

"It's been reported Marvel Comics is getting set to bring back Captain America. They're going to do this as soon as they get a loan from Captain China." --Conan O'Brien

"A Tea Party group has a summer camp for kids, the only one where they sit around the campfire and tell scary stories about taxing the top 2%." –Conan O'Brien

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”



 

Thanks for making me look like the president of the century (When you come straight to work from the cocaine orgy)


"Did you hear about this? In Afghanistan, the U.S. has discovered large deposits of iron, copper, cobalt, gold, and lithium. Or, as most people would call it, 'not Osama bin Laden.'" –Jimmy Fallon


Today is President Trump's 72nd birthday. Everyone in the White House hid to jump out and yell "Surprise," and while they were hiding they were like, "Hey, we found Melania!" At one point the staff brought out a piñata for Trump but the president just deported it. --Jimmy Fallon


Next Trump birthday card is from Sean Spicer. It says, “Today, I’m toasting to you.” And inside it says, “Because you’re the reason I drink every day.” And finally, here’s one from George W. Bush. It says, “Here’s to you.” And inside it says, “For making me look like the president of the century.” –Jimmy Fallon


"Mitt Romney visited a restaurant in Iowa, and had trouble thinking of the word for donut. Newt Gingrich merely responded, 'That never would have happened if I were the nominee.'" –Jimmy Fallon


http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”



 

Thursday, May 19, 2022

Oh, wait, I think I read that whole thing wrong. (Next time you get invited to a cocaine orgy, just go.)


May 2022

“Madison Cawthorn, a representative from North Carolina, lost his re-election bid in the state’s primary on Tuesday. Hopefully, he’ll learn his lesson: Next time you get invited to a cocaine orgy, just go.” —Seth Meyers

“You know, guys, politics is a rough-and-tumble business, and D.C. can be a cruel town. Just when you feel like you’re making headway in Congress, you’re unceremoniously forced out by a cruel and unforgiving system of cutthroats and back stabbers. And that’s exactly what happened last night when one of our nation’s most committed public servants, a camera-shy policy wonk who is laser-focused on serving the greater good, lost his bid for re-election. Oh, wait, I think I read that whole thing wrong. Oh, I read every word wrong. It was just Madison Cawthorn!” —Seth Meyers

“Donald Trump loyalist Madison Cawthorn was defeated in the North Carolina Republican primaries on Tuesday, which will end the 26-year-old freshman congressman’s scandal-ridden term in office. Oh Madison, you may be gone but soon you’ll be forgotten. Cawthorn, once seen as a rising star within the party, faced an aggressive opposition campaign waged by fellow Republicans disgruntled with his antics – calling the Ukrainian president, Volodymyr Zelenskiy, a ‘thug’, for example, as well as accusations of insider trading. I will say, it’s a rare treat to watch Republicans tear each other apart, because when Republicans decide to knife each other, they hold nothing back. Democrats just snipe at each other on cable news about who’s responsible for their poll numbers. They’re like the Wasp-y Connecticut family that just passive aggressively bickers at the dinner table and then goes to bed full of quiet resentment. Going from that to Republican infighting is like when you date someone whose family is Italian and you go over to their house for dinner and they’re just chucking plates of spaghetti across the room.” —Seth Meyers

“The last straw for many in the GOP was when, in a podcast interview in March, Cawthorn claimed to have been invited to cocaine-fueled sex parties by fellow Republicans. Normally I would’ve dismissed that all as ridiculous, except the GOP freaked out. Nevertheless, Cawthorn still received support from Donald Trump, who posted ‘let’s give Madison a second chance’ on Truth Social before the primary. ‘Let’s give Madison a second chance’ sounds like something you’d hear at a sorority after a pledge barfs all over the rug.” —Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Thursday, April 21, 2022

That’s like being told halfway through a dinner party that it’s an orgy (The Florida food pyramid is just gator jerky and meth)


 “A federal judge in Florida struck down the C.D.C.’s mask mandate for public transportation on Monday. This judge claimed that the C.D.C. exceeded their legal authority by requiring masks and that their power was limited to things like cleaning property, not requiring people to take hygienic steps. Yes, you cannot force people to follow basic hygiene; you can only make them clean property, explains the new bathroom sign: ‘Before returning to work, employees must wash this sign.’” —Stephen Colbert

“The judges court order is great news for anyone who ever rode public transport and said ‘this is way too sanitary.’” —Stephen Colbert

“The ruling came from Kathryn Kimball Mizelle, a Tampa-based federal judge appointed by Trump after he lost the 2020 election. You can’t let Florida make health decisions for the entire country! That’s not smart! The Florida food pyramid is just gator jerky and meth.” —Stephen Colbert

“All major airline carriers immediately changed their mask policies, with some announcing the change mid-flight. Look, people can take this news however they want, but it’s unfair for people who might be immunocompromised or traveling with unvaccinated children to change the rules mid-flight. That’s like being told halfway through a dinner party that it’s an orgy.” —Stephen Colbert

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Monday, April 11, 2022

The problem was a lot of people took off their masks during the post-dinner orgy (1 in 6 American children live in poverty)


April 2022

Health officials say that after the Annual Gridiron Dinner in Washington, D.C. became a Covid Superspreader Event with more than 50 high-ranking officials getting infected. The problem was a lot of people took off their masks during the post-dinner orgy. —Colin Jost

Health officials in Washington, D.C. confirmed that a fox that bit a congressman near the capital had rabies. Officials suspect the fox contracted rabies when it was bitten by Marjorie Taylor Greene. —Colin Jost

As punishment for slapping Chris Rock, The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences have banned Will Smith from attending the Oscars for ten years. But is that a punishment? He can still be nominated, he can even win an award. He can even go the after party. He just doesn’t have to attend the four-hour ceremony where someone is definitely going to make fun of his wife again. I think, honestly, I think a real punishment would be to make Will Smith host next year’s Oscars. Because trust me, nothing will make you question your choices in life more than hosting an awards show. —Colin Jost

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Sunday, April 3, 2022

It would be a real shame if something happened to your package (old man orgy)


April 2022

 And in non-Oscar news, Madison Cawthorn said in a recent interview that 70 year-old republicans invited him to an orgy and did cocaine in front of him. Wait. So you went to the old man orgy? And you thought the weird part was drugs? —Colin Jost

Senator Lindsay Graham, seen here picturing the orgy that Madison Cawthorn was at, said that Ketanji Brown Jackson is a person of exceptionally good character but would not support her for the Supreme Court. So like many Southern gentlemen he’s comfortable with black folks until they try to move in next door. —Colin Jost


Workers at the Adamson Warehouse in Staten Island voted to become the first Amazon workers in the country to form a Union. The new Union explains Amazon’s new slogan, ‘It would be a real shame if something happened to your package.’ —Colin Jost


http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

Friday, April 1, 2022

Uh oh, looks like another cocaine orgy (an over-the-pants handy)


March 2022

“And Republican congressman Madison Cawthorn is now taking back the comments he made about fellow lawmakers inviting him to orgies and doing cocaine in his presence. In a meeting with House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy, Cawthorn admitted his comments were ‘exaggerated.’ He talked a big game about cocaine and orgies, but in reality, it was just Claritin, and an over-the-pants handy.” —James Corden

“First he said on a podcast that they did cocaine in front of him; now he says he thinks he may have seen a staffer in a parking garage from 100 yards away. How deluded are you to be in a parking garage, seeing someone lean over to pick up their keys and thinking, ‘Uh oh, looks like another cocaine orgy’?” —James Corden


“That was obviously a very bizarre and shocking allegation, and it pissed off Cawthorn’s G.O.P. colleagues because he seemed to be accusing his fellow Republicans of being the sex-crazed drug addicts. And by the way, let me just state for the record, I don’t care — have your orgies. You’re consenting adults. If you want to roll out a tarp in a Holiday Inn conference room and go to town on each other, be my guest.” —Seth Meyers

“Dude, when you’re trying to tamp down orgy rumors, don’t say ‘members,’ just say people — we know who you mean.” —Seth Meyers

“He sounds like me in high school trying to convince my mom and dad that everyone at the party was drinking except me: ‘No, I just had — I just had a Sprite because I didn’t like the taste of liquor.’” —James Corden


http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Thursday, March 31, 2022

GOP FREAKS Over Madison Cawthorn Drug & Orgy Claims | Breaking Points

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


I’m gonna go out on a limb here, he wasn’t invited to the orgy (We will investigate the feasibility of an orgy at a later date)


March 2022

“Speaking of right-wing weirdos, there’s some splashback to the story from North Carolina congressman and haunted jack-in-the-box, Madison Cawthorn. Recently, Cawthorn made some extraordinary claims that his Republican colleagues in Congress are orgy-frequenting degenerates with a fondness for hard drugs. Given the average age of the G.O.P., I assume they’re snorting Boniva.” —Stephen Colbert

“Come on, man, do you really expect us to believe that Congress could plan and execute an orgy? At best, I can see them announcing an exploratory committee that would begin to investigate the feasibility of an orgy at a later date.” —Seth Meyers

“House G.O.P. leader Kevin McCarthy called Cawthorn into his office today, maybe hoping to score an invite or to tell him to stop narcing.” —Seth Meyers


“Rep. Dan Crenshaw of Texas said, ‘It does paint the picture here that isn’t accurate.’ Thank god, because that picture is too awful to be real. I’ve interviewed 80 members of Congress, and I’d have sex with two and a half of them. Not at the same time, of course — I’m not in the G.O.P.” —Stephen Colbert

“This whole group of pro-Trump toadies is just so weird and loathsome, like Texas Senator Ted Cruz, for example, who, I’m gonna go out on a limb here, wasn’t invited to the orgy.” —Seth Meyers

“Oh, please don’t name names, because all those names go with faces we know.” —Seth Meyers

“Also, I got to say, if they were having orgies and doing cocaine, I would actually find that impressive. I mean, they’re all 70 and 80 years old. If you told me Chuck Grassley was snorting blow and boning nonstop, I’d be like, ‘Damn, maybe he’s more with it than I thought.’” —Seth Meyers


http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”


 

Friday, October 27, 2017

Go to your safe space and think tax cuts (friendship orgy)



A lot of people have been talking about the fact that three Republican senators — Flake, McCain and Corker — have called Donald Trump unfit for office. Sure, scientists, psychiatrists, human rights activists and world and religious leaders have also said it. But, eventually, Republicans did as well. They’re late to everything. They just found out about “Gangnam Style.” –Stephen Colbert

But Trump claimed everybody got along great at yesterday’s big Republican unity lunch: [clip of Trump] “I think we had a — I called it a ‘love fest.’ It was almost a love fest. Maybe it WAS a love fest.” Maybe it was a love fest, could have been a friendship orgy, we’re still checking. –Stephen Colbert
     
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #books #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

Friday, September 22, 2017

It’s come out that some species of frogs have sex orgies (Hop of Shame)



Arnold Schwarzenegger is going to return to the next "Terminator" movie. In this one, Arnold goes back in time to erase all traces of him hosting "Celebrity Apprentice." –Conan O’Brien

It’s come out that some species of frogs have sex orgies. These are followed the next morning by the frogs doing the "Hop of Shame." –Conan O’Brien
     
http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #Bernie2020 #FeeltheBern #repealreplacerepublicans

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

I may be broke, but I'm not flat-busted (That's an orgy for him)



"People all over the world now are following our election. And according to a new international poll that just came out, I think this came out a few hours ago, this is true, people in Canada want Barack Obama to be the next U.S. president. That's what they're saying. In Canada, yeah. That makes sense, because Obama has the support of Canada's anti-war voters, as well as Canada's black guy. He is very excited." --Conan O'Brien


"Of course, now everyone's digging into Sarah Palin's past. That's what's happening now. All the media is digging into her past. Democrats are digging into her past. And here's the latest. There's an old picture of Sarah Palin circulating on the internet right now, and she's wearing a t-shirt that says, 'I may be broke, but I'm not flat-busted.' Yeah, John McCain was upset when he heard this and asked, 'What's the internet?'" --Conan O'Brien


"Political observers are pointing out, maybe you've seen this too, that at campaign rallies, John McCain likes to give Sarah Palin a hug, then give his wife a kiss on the cheek. That's the ritual, yeah. When asked about it, McCain said, 'Believe me, that's about as much sex as I can handle.' That's an orgy for him. I went too far." --Conan O'Brien