Experts are already calling it the World Most Expensive 'No.' (as they get a loan from Captain China)

"A new report says that Donald Trump has spent one million dollars trying to figure out if he should run for president in 2016. Experts are already calling it the World Most Expensive 'No.'" –Conan O'Brien

"It's been reported Marvel Comics is getting set to bring back Captain America. They're going to do this as soon as they get a loan from Captain China." --Conan O'Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

It's our job to do the exact opposite (that's going to drive good people out of the fraud business)

"The House passed a bill where there's a tax now of 90% on the bonuses that these people get. So, half the Republicans voted against this. They said this is exactly the kind of punitive taxation that's going to drive good people out of the fraud business." --Bill Maher 

It's a bullish market. Lobbyists who used to just lease a congressman are now buying. --Bill Maher

"Marvel Comics announced that the next Captain America will be black. He has the same powers as white Captain America except he has to show ID when he votes." –Bill Maher

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Surprised but grateful (How'd Those People Get Beyond the Gates?)

Two people at a movie theater in Washington state watching Captain America Brave New World, were surprised when the theater ceiling collapsed on them. Surprised but grateful. —Colin Jost

CBS This week premiered the first daytime black soap opera called Beyond the Gates, and also a crossover white soap opera called How'd Those People Get Beyond the Gates? —Colin Jost

Dunkin’ Donuts announced that it will stop charging you more money if you ask for plant based milk in your coffee, but they will keep calling you a p*ssy. —Colin Jost

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Apparently, she has never celebrated Halloween in San Francisco (Captain China)

Today Jeb Bush announced he's running for president on Snapchat. By using Snapchat, Bush's message will disappear after 10 seconds just like the excitement over his campaign.—Conan O’Brien

"It's been reported Marvel Comics is getting set to bring back Captain America. They're going to do this as soon as they get a loan from Captain China." --Conan O'Brien

"Rep. Michele Bachmann once said that gay people lead a very sad life. Apparently, she has never celebrated Halloween in San Francisco." –Conan O'Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

They said this is exactly the kind of punitive taxation that's going to drive good people out of the fraud business (teeth care for the elderly)

"The House passed a bill where there's a tax now of 90% on the bonuses that these CEOs get. So, half the Republicans voted against this. They said this is exactly the kind of punitive taxation that's going to drive good people out of the fraud business." --Bill Maher 

"Marvel Comics announced that the next Captain America will be black. He has the same powers as white Captain America except he has to show ID when he votes." –Bill Maher

"But you know who might be the perfect Mitt Romney Vice President? Tim Pawlenty. He almost makes Mitt Romney look interesting, in the way that a blank sheet of paper makes a sheet of paper with a smudge on it look interesting." –Bill Maher

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

They're going to do this as soon as they get a loan from Captain China (Tell McKinley I'm busy)

Donald Trump has called for a ban on all immigration to the United States. Of course, Trump said the ban would be lifted if he ever needs a new wife. –Conan O’Brien

"In Michigan, the world's oldest person recently turned 116. When the president called to congratulate her, she said, 'Tell McKinley I'm busy.'" –Conan O'Brien

"It's been reported Marvel Comics is getting set to bring back Captain America. They're going to do this as soon as they get a loan from Captain China." --Conan O'Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

They're trying so hard to get black people to stay in their homes, it looks like election day down there (Layers of Protection)

"People in Florida are pretty worried about the George Zimmerman acquittal. They're trying so hard to get black people to stay in their homes, it looks like election day down there." –Bill Maher

"Sarah Palin said she may run for the Senate. She said being a U.S. senator is a job she's always dreamed of resigning from." –Bill Maher

"Marvel Comics announced that the next Captain America will be black. He has the same powers as white Captain America except he has to show ID when he votes." –Bill Maher

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Apparently, she has never celebrated Halloween in San Francisco (The first rule of Orgy Club is...)

"Tough times all over. Amusement park company Six Flags is filing for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection. Experts say it's due in large part to their money-losing ride, Chrysler Mountain." --Conan O'Brien

"Rep. Michele Bachmann once said that gay people lead a very sad life. Apparently, she has never celebrated Halloween in San Francisco." –Conan O'Brien

"It's been reported Marvel Comics is getting set to bring back Captain America. They're going to do this as soon as they get a loan from Captain China." --Conan O'Brien

"A Tea Party group has a summer camp for kids, the only one where they sit around the campfire and tell scary stories about taxing the top 2%." –Conan O'Brien

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

their favorite part is when Captain America asks Captain China for a $17 trillion loan (President Barack O-buzzkill)

April 2014

"Big news out of the White House. According to a new rule, Secret Service agents can no longer drink alcohol 12 hours before reporting to duty. The rule came at the request of President Barack O-buzzkill." –Conan O'Brien

"The North Korean dictator is in the news again. He was re-elected with 100 percent of the vote. He said, 'I haven't been this happy since I scored 700,000 on the SAT exam.'" –Conan O'Brien

"Captain America is currently the No. 1 movie in China. The Chinese say their favorite part is when Captain America asks Captain China for a $17 trillion loan." –Conan O'Brien

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

These Blueberry Scones are to Die For (Captain China)

"It's been reported Marvel Comics is getting set to bring back Captain America. They're going to do this as soon as they get a loan from Captain China." --Conan O'Brien

"Tough times all over. Amusement park company Six Flags is filing for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection. Experts say it's due in large part to their money-losing ride, Chrysler Mountain." --Conan O'Brien

"This is weird. The state of New Hampshire is projecting an additional $55 million in revenue, now that they've legalized gay marriage. Yeah, as a result, the state motto has been changed from 'Live Free or Die' to 'These Blueberry Scones are to Die For.'" --Conan O'Brien

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Even guys who go to Hooters for the wings were like, “Yeah, right.”

President Trump just did an interview where he wondered why the Civil War ever happened. Then Education Secretary Betsy DeVos said, “That’s easy, Captain America and Iron Man got in a big fight.” –Jimmy Fallon

Trump defended all his trips that he’s made to his golf courses, saying that he only goes there to hold meetings. Even guys who go to Hooters for the wings were like, “Yeah, right.” –Jimmy Fallon

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #Bernie2020 #JusticeDemocrats

Have you met a straight guy in this shape?

The electronics company LG identified a new phenomenon called low-battery anxiety. People become nervous, distracted, and frustrated when their phones are about to die. If you are not familiar with low-battery anxiety, it's a real condition that primarily affects people with no actual problems. –James Corden

Trump won a primary last night. He got 76 percent. John Kasich got 9.8 percent. Somehow Kasich is doing better since he dropped out. –Jimmy Kimmel

There's a movement online, a hashtag, called #GiveCaptainAmericaABoyfriend. They want Marvel Comics to make Captain America gay. I wouldn't be surprised if he already is. Have you met a straight guy in this shape? –Jimmy Kimmel

We're going to attack you, but first you should eat

"Before the incursion that started yesterday the Israeli's agreed to a five hour cease fire so the Palestinians could get supplies and food - how Jewish is that? 'We're going to attack you, but first you should eat.'" –Bill Maher



"Marvel Comics announced that the next Captain America will be black. He has the same powers as white Captain America except he has to show ID when he votes." –Bill Maher



"Edward Snowden is back with yet another spying scandal. In a new interview, Snowden revealed that NSA employees regularly pass around nude pictures of people they spy on. It got even weirder when German Chancellor Angela Merkel said, 'So, vat do you think?'" –Jimmy Fallon