and not the kind of mistakes you can fix with a sharpie (the singles scene in Alaska)

Donald Trump himself had a relatively quiet week, for him. He committed only like three brazenly impeachable acts. But he did fire his third national security adviser, John Bolton. Trump said Bolton made some very big mistakes and not the kind you can fix with a sharpie. --Bill Maher

Trump loves that sharpie. That's his thing now, like Michael Jackson's glove. He's got it everywhere. After the Alabama hurricane was such a success he thinks he can fix anything with that sharpie. Yesterday he drew a smile on Melania’s face. --Bill Maher

Todd Palin filed for divorce from Sarah Palin. That’s when you know that you have had enough when you are willing to take a chance on the singles scene in Alaska.  --Bill Maher

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

Halliburton has a no-bid contract to do the installation on it (Don't ask, don't get sick)

"Dick Cheney had to consult his physician today. Not for his heart. Every time the price of oil goes up more than $1 a barrel, Cheney gets an erection that lasts more than 4 hours." –Jay Leno

"Dick Cheney says he may need a heart transplant. I understand Halliburton has a no-bid contract to do the installation on it." –Jay Leno

"The debate over repealing healthcare began in the House today. The republicans have their own plan: 'Don't ask, don't get sick.'" –Jay Leno

"And today, the Secret Service revealed that Sarah Palin's Secret Service code name is 'Denali.' Now, here's my question. What's the secret part? I mean, if the Secret Service is going to give you a Secret Service code name, shouldn't they keep it a secret? I mean, why don't they just call her Sarah?" They also revealed that Sarah's husband, Todd, who works in the oil field. Well, his Secret Service codename is 'Driller.' I guess they figured Bill Clinton wasn't using it anymore." --Jay Leno

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

I guess they figured Bill Clinton wasn't using it anymore (magic eight ball kind of answer)

"That was a big bone of contention today on the cable talk shows. Supporters of Palin say, it's okay she doesn't know what the Bush doctrine is because the average American doesn't know what it is. But shouldn't the bar be a little higher for this job? Shouldn't they be a little above average? I mean, hey, let's be honest. We already had an average guy as president. It didn't work out that great." --Jay Leno



"Sarah Palin was also asked if we might have to go to war with Russia, and she said, 'Perhaps so.' Isn't that like a magic eight ball kind of answer?" --Jay Leno



"And today, the Secret Service revealed that Sarah Palin's Secret Service code name is 'Denali.' Now, here's my question. What's the secret part? I mean, if the Secret Service is going to give you a Secret Service code name, shouldn't they keep it a secret? I mean, why don't they just call her Sarah?" --Jay Leno



"They also revealed that Sarah's husband, Todd, who works in the oil field. Well, his Secret Service codename is 'Driller.' I guess they figured Bill Clinton wasn't using it anymore." --Jay Leno

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #FeeltheBern @justicedems @BrandNew535 #Bernie2020

A tragic case of trash on trash violence

"Sarah Palin's whole family got into a drunken, public fistfight. Something police are calling a tragic case of trash on trash violence." –Bill Maher



"Apparently it got very gnarly. The Palins, the whole family, showed up in a stretch hummer at this party and saw a guy who had broken up with Willow, and they all wanted to fight him. Bristol threw punches. Willow wailed on this guy. Todd had a bloody nose. Sarah was screaming, 'Don't you know who I am?!' And Track tore off his shirt and was walking down the street giving everyone the finger. I have only one thing to say about this: 'ISIS, do you really want to mess with this?'" –Bill Maher



Do you have any Grey Poupon? (real streets of America)

"Newt Gingrich was cheating on his second wife while he was prosecuting Bill Clinton for the Monica Lewinsky thing. In other words, Newt puts the 'hippo' in 'Hypocrite.'" –Jimmy Kimmel



"Gingrich is lining up impressive endorsements. Todd Palin, Gary Busey, and now, Chuck Norris. I'll tell you, his endorsements could beat up Mitt Romney's endorsements." –Jimmy Kimmel



"During a debate, Mitt Romney said he grew up in the real streets of America. Yes, the real streets, where people pull up next to you and ask if you have any Grey Poupon." –Jimmy Kimmel 



    

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #JohnHulse #collectedpoems #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

Todd received a beautiful pair of Tiffany earrings

"Newt got an important endorsement this week – Todd Palin. I'm not kidding. Sarah Palin's formerly mute husband, Todd, endorsed Newt Gingrich. We don't know why, but today Todd received a beautiful pair of Tiffany earrings." –Bill Maher



"Rick Santorum told an audience in South Carolina Mitt Romney was just a 'paler shade of what we have in the White House now.' And the guy in the back of the room stood up and said, 'I thought that was the whole point." –Bill Maher



"I'm sensing Mitt Romney isn't that popular with Republicans. On the New Hampshire ballot he was listed as 'Mitt Romney, I guess.'" –Seth Meyers on Saturday Night Live's "Weekend Update"



John Hulse painting

It's time to Mitt or get off the pot

"In New Hampshire, the Republican primary election took place. New Hampshire voters gathered to decide which middle-aged white guy looked best in a pair of pleated Dockers." –Jimmy Kimmel



"Newt Gingrich thinks he's the man for the job. He got an important endorsement from Sarah Palin's husband, Todd. He has the all-important 'snowmobilers who wear sunglasses indoors' demographic." –Jimmy Kimmel



"I came up with a great slogan for Romney. "It's time to Mitt or get off the pot." –Jimmy Kimmel



John Hulse photography

Behind every great woman, there's a snowmobile racer

"According to a new study, male politicians run for office to be somebody, while female politicians run to do something. The study has a margin of error of plus or minus Sarah Palin." –Conan O'Brien

"According to reports, Osama bin Laden's bedroom had the only air conditioner in his compound. I don't know about you guys, but I'm starting to think that he was kind of a jerk." –Jimmy Fallon



"According to recently released emails, Sarah Palin relied on her husband, Todd, quite frequently for policy advice. You know what they say: Behind every great woman, there's a snowmobile racer." –Jimmy Kimmel



John Hulse painting

When will one of these stories have a happy ending?

"'The National Enquirer' says Sarah Palin’s husband Todd has been having an affair with a massage therapist who’s also been arrested for prostitution. What is it with all these massage therapists? Al Gore, Brett Favre, and now Todd Palin. When will one of these stories have a happy ending?" –Jay Leno



"Obama is huge in the polls these days. His popularity is soaring. Even conservatives are coming around. 30 percent of them now believe Obama deserves a Green Card." –Bill Maher



"While in Washington, Chinese President Hu Jintao met with members of Congress. It was very festive as the leader of Red China met with our orange speaker of the House." –Jay Leno



When will one of these stories have a happy ending?

"'The National Enquirer' says Sarah Palin’s husband Todd has been having an affair with a massage therapist who’s also been arrested for prostitution. What is it with all these massage therapists? Al Gore, Brett Favre, and now Todd Palin. When will one of these stories have a happy ending?" –Jay Leno



"Obama is huge in the polls these days. His popularity is soaring. Even conservatives are coming around. 30 percent of them now believe Obama deserves a Green Card." –Bill Maher



"While in Washington, Chinese President Hu Jintao met with members of Congress. It was very festive as the leader of Red China met with our orange speaker of the House." –Jay Leno