which means there is still no legal way to enjoy a Cleveland Browns game (a cry for help)

In Ohio, people voted on a referendum which would have had to legalize marijuana in that state, but it did not pass. That's right, it remains illegal to get high in Ohio, which means there is still no legal way to enjoy a Cleveland Browns game. –James Corden

The FDA is currently debating whether the chocolate hazelnut topping Nutella should be classified as a dessert or a spread. Which is ridiculous. Nutella isn’t a dessert or a spread, it’s a cry for help. –James Corden

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

On the first day of Votemas your voting gave to me (it’s a cry for help)

The FDA is currently debating whether the chocolate hazelnut topping Nutella should be classified as a dessert or a spread. Which is ridiculous. Nutella isn’t a dessert or a spread, it’s a cry for help. –James Corden

The Cubs went 108 years without winning the World Series. The only drought more epic than that was the one I experienced during college. I’m joking — I didn’t go to college. –James Corden

The Dodgers lost in seven games, but in L.A. they talk about baseball a little differently. Here they say, they say that the Dodgers were canceled after seven episodes. –James Corden

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Colonoscopy 2: 2 Blocked 2 Scope (Biden Inert)

“Yes, Trump’s first part of his physical is going to be such a hit that next year, they’re coming out with a sequel: ‘Colonoscopy 2: 2 Blocked 2 Scope.’” --Stephen Colbert

“I just had one. My doctor never said, ‘O.K., uh, drop your pants, uh, bend over, try to relax — I’ll be back in six months.’” --Stephen Colbert

“Phase 1 was this weekend, Phase 2 is next — was this a physical or a kitchen remodel?” --Jimmy Kimmel

“Phase 1 of a physical? That sounded strange so we did some digging and discovered that his annual physical has five phases, so let’s take a look now at the five phases of Donald Trump’s annual physical. Phase 1: Measure his official height and negotiate his official weight. Phase 2: A complete strip, spackle, priming and repainting. Phase 3: His annual battery of paternity tests. Phase 4: Surgically remove his hand from a Nutella jar. And finally, Phase 5: Ask about getting breast implants — not the procedure, he just wants to play around with them.” --Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 
A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

This is going to be like if Tupac hired Biggie to be his head of security (two fingers in the dark)

McDonald’s is unveiling something called a Nutella burger at its locations in Italy. This goes against the traditional way of eating Nutella, which is with two fingers in the dark while crying at 3 a.m. –James Corden

The craziest, most unbelievable story of National Fast Food Day has got to be the one that has come out of Russia, where Burger King just debuted a new item in honor of our president-elect called the Trump burger. It comes with a very spicy sauce, onion rings, and jalapenos; just like Trump’s election, it’s really hard to swallow. –James Corden

President-elect Donald Trump is in the process of building his Cabinet right now and it’s going to be a solid gold Cabinet full of all the finest snacks. This is kind of nutty. One of the names on Trump’s short list for attorney general is Senator Ted Cruz. Who, of course, was Trump’s bitter rival on the campaign trail. This is going to be like if Tupac hired Biggie to be his head of security. –Jimmy Kimmel

they use it as a replacement for their girlfriend (except in Iraq)

The FDA is currently debating whether the chocolate hazelnut topping Nutella should be classified as a dessert or a spread. Which is ridiculous. Nutella isn’t a dessert or a spread, it’s a cry for help. –James Corden

The Food and Drug Administration is asking people what they use Nutella for, and 37 percent said dessert, 23 percent said as a spread, and 40 percent said they use it as a replacement for their girlfriend. –James Corden

Also in the news, last night the Cubs won the World Series for the first time since 1908. That’s so long ago, the 2016 election hadn’t even started yet. –James Corden