It is kind of like being the best-dressed person at Wal-Mart

John Kasich gave a 30-minute speech in New York City. Afterwards, the crowd applauded Kasich and then put $8.34 in his hat. –Conan O’Brien

A new exhibit shows eight of the alternate endings Ernest Hemingway considered using for his classic novel "A Farewell to Arms." In my opinion the worst is the one that ends with "see ya later, arms!" –Conan O’Brien

A new poll has found that Bernie Sanders is the most likable of all the presidential candidates. Which, let’s face it, is kind of like being the best-dressed person at Wal-Mart. –Seth Meyers