When life gives you Yemens, you make Yemenade (a woman named Juanita)

"Liz Cheney has decided to pull out of her Senate campaign race in Wyoming — thus making her the first Cheney with an actual exit strategy." –Jay Leno

"And former President Bush says he's been following the situation in Yemen very carefully. But, you know, we love President Bush, but I don't think he really understands the situation. Like today, Bush said, 'When life gives you Yemens, you make Yemenade.'" –Jay Leno

"Mitt Romney, whose father was born in Mexico, is now talking up his Mexican heritage. Not to be outdone today, Newt Gingrich said he once cheated on one of his wives with a woman named Juanita." –Jay Leno

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

just so she wouldn’t be the least popular person on stage (she is water)

Nick Bosa of the San Francisco 49ers was fined by the NFL for pointing to his MAGA hat during a broadcast. The fine will go to promoting LGBTQ sports, also known as soccer. —Greg Gutfeld

Donald Trump has named former ICE director Tom Homan as his Border Czar. And to prove that he’s not messing around, Homan asked Melania for her paperwork. —Greg Gutfeld

Kamala Harris had to appear with Liz Cheney just so she wouldn’t be the least popular person on stage. —Greg Gutfeld

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.” 

 

Well, technically, he was half man, half iced tea (It's not even hard)

With just two weeks before the presidential election, we have officially entered into the fever dream portion of the campaign. Right is left, up is down, the Republican nominee is hanging out at a Bronx barber’s shop, while the Democrat is hosting some sort of book club with Liz Cheney. What the fuck?! —Jon Stewart 

“While speaking over the weekend at a campaign rally in Pennsylvania, former President Trump discussed golf legend Arnold Palmer and said he was ‘all man.’ Well, technically, he was half man, half iced tea.” —Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

she was deeply saddened to be reminded that your partner could live that long (Beaver Moon)

Melania Trump made a rare public appearance when she attended the funeral of former first lady Rosalyn Carter at the age of 96. Melania said that she was deeply saddened to be reminded that your partner could live that long. —Michael Che

In her new book, Liz Cheney claims that one republican called Donald Trump ‘Orange Jesus.’ But it’s like you always say Colin, there’s only one Jesus and he’s white. —Michael Che

One of the founders of the Black Lives Matter movement announced that he is supporting Donald Trump for President. And I’m going to assume he announced it at a traffic stop. —Michael Che

These week sky gazers were treated to the Beaver Moon, which is only visible for a few seconds when the moon gets out of the shower. —Michael Che

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.” 

 

He’s just jealous because De Niro’s Casino was successful (Peace? No...We can't afford it!)

Liz Cheney’s new book, Oath and Honor is out, and she claims that the Republican congressman Mark Green referred to Trump on 6 January as “Orange Jesus”. The only way that Trump is like Jesus is that they both got other people to write their books for them. —Seth Meyers

Cheney also wrote that after losing the 2020 election, Trump was so depressed that he stopped eating. Unless you count the thousands and thousands of classified documents. —Seth Meyers

And the University of Minnesota announced that it would launch its own cannabis research center, or, as they’re more commonly known, dorms. —Seth Meyers

Meanwhile, Donald Trump attacked Robert De Niro for criticizing him in a recent awards speech, saying “very much like Crooked Joe Biden, he can’t put two sentences together”. As opposed to Trump, who’s about to put four sentences together. He’s just jealous because De Niro’s Casino was successful. —Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

the only Trump being held in prison right now is Melania (This is like if O.J. had been turned in by his gloves)

October 2022

“The House January 6th committee’s 10th and potentially final public hearing was on Thursday, which felt a lot like Game of Thrones coming back but instead of dragons roasting people alive, Liz Cheney was doing it.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“A lot of the evidence in these hearings came from Trump’s inner circle. This is like if O.J. had been turned in by his gloves.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“Among the evidence presented on Thursday was video testimony from former White House aide Cassidy Hutchinson. According to Hutchinson, Donald Trump was well aware that he lost the 2020 election, telling chief of staff Mark Meadows: ‘I don’t want people to know we lost, Mark, this is embarrassing.’ Is that more embarrassing than continuing to say you won an election two years after you lost that election? Man, did his parents do a number on him.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“The committee also presented audio of Trump aides Steve Bannon and Roger Stone baldly stating plans to discredit the election before the results were known. After seeing all this evidence, it’s crazy that the only Trump being held in prison right now is Melania.” —Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Liz Cheney go bye bye now (just put a bunch of Reese’s Pieces in a line off a cliff)

August 2022

“After Liz Cheney,  the vice-chair of the January 6th committee, lost to a Trump-backed rival who has echoed his election conspiracy theories, the former president released a statement saying Cheney ‘should be ashamed of herself’ and would now ‘disappear into the depths of political oblivion’. There’s no way that Trump wrote that! This is the same guy who said ‘I don’t like saying yesterday. It’s a hard word for me.’ If I was to bet, he probably has a guy who fancies up his words for him. Trump’s original draft was probably ‘Liz Cheney go bye bye now.’” —Trevor Noah

“Say what you want about Liz Cheney but you have to respect how she stood up against Trump even when she knew she was going to get blown out of her seat. It is saying something about the state of the GOP that the brave stance was don’t hang the vice-president but still she stood by it.” —Trevor Noah

“But Cheney is not the only Republican who fell on their sword. Only 10 republicans voted to impeach, and out of those 10, four lost their primaries to a Trump challenger and four retired so that they wouldn’t lose to a Trump challenger. Right now, any Republican who opposes Trump, he’ll flush their asses away like one of those Trump secret documents, he doesn’t play games.” —Trevor Noah

“Things aren’t over just yet as Cheney has vowed that she will still do anything to stop Trump from becoming president again, even possibly running against him in the Republican primary. It probably is a long shot, also don’t forget, she is a Cheney and if there’s one thing they’re committed to, it’s regime change. If she wants to stop Trump, she doesn’t need to beat him in a presidential race, just put a bunch of Reese’s Pieces in a line off a cliff.” —Trevor Noah

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Trump was so excited, he threw a ticker-tape parade made out of classified documents (You'll melt your face off, kid!)

August 2022

I saw that since the FBI’s search of Mar-a-Lago, former President Trump has been scrambling to put together a team of experience lawyers, but everyone is turning him down. Trump needs to be careful. If he says, “I’m desperate” three times in a row, Rudy Giuliani will appear. —Jimmy Fallon

Meanwhile, the other big political story is that representative Liz Cheney, who’s on the January 6th committee and has been an outspoken about Trump’s defeat in the election, lost her primary race to a challenger that he endorsed. Trump was so excited, he threw a ticker-tape parade made out of classified documents. —Jimmy Fallon

I read that some scientists think that we should start naming heat waves the way that we have other natural disasters so that people take them more seriously. But I’m not sure naming them is a good idea. Take a look at the weather report I just saw. ‘If you’re in the Midwest, brace yourselves ‘cause Kayleigh is coming, and she is hot. Extremely hot! Experts are rating Kayleigh a scorching hot 10. Way hotter than Jemma, who has been downgraded to an 8. Kayleigh is only expected to get hotter as she moves toward L.A.’ This feels wrong to me. —Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

This grown man running on his little gazelle legs? (Either way, we’ll be waiting with bated breath)

July 2022

“This was the final public hearing by the House January 6th select committee until September, which didn’t just expose the president for throwing a Trump tantrum, they also took a moment to reveal that a lot of the bravado that we’ve seen from far-right Republican lawmakers wasn’t exactly how they felt while the ‘patriots’ were ransacking the Capitol. In particular, the January 6th committee dragged the far-right Missouri senator Josh Hawley, who raised his fist in solidarity with the mob upon entering the Capitol and was later caught on tape running away from the attack. I’m sorry, but the January 6th committee should be ashamed of itself. They had no reason to show this. They just wanted to embarrass a senator of the United States. Why? Just because he ran away like a little bitch? Yeah he raised his fist and egged the crowd on, but is that a reason to show him pissing his pants on national television? Is it a crime to be crying and running away from the mob that you riled up? Oh, he’s such a bitch-ass. Let me tell you something! That bitch-ass thought the mob was going to kill him. Is that funny to you? This grown man running on his little gazelle legs?” —Trevor Noah

“So sadly, that’s it for season one of the January 6th hearings. But good news: it’s already renewed for season two, which drops in September. And like any good series, they’re leaving us with some major cliffhangers: will they find the Secret Service’s deleted text messages? Will Liz Cheney and Adam Kinzinger finally realize that the love they’ve been looking for has been right in front of them this whole time? Will we find out that Steve Bannon is the source of monkeypox? Either way, we’ll be waiting with bated breath.” —Trevor Noah

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Is he partying on that yacht or is he haunting it? (President poop emoji is baby crying emoji in car emoji?)

July 2022

“People could easily view the deleted messages as part of a cover-up of January 6th within the administration – people say that this was proof the Secret Service was in on the Capitol plot. But it could also be a much simpler answer. Maybe they just don’t want people to see the texts they were sending about their boss. Could you imagine being at the Congressional hearing and Liz Cheney is like, ‘so Agent Johnson, what did you mean when you texted: President poop emoji is baby crying emoji in car emoji?’” —Trevor Noah

“Elon Musk was photographed vacationing on a yacht with friends off the coast of Mykonos, Greece this weekend, and all I can say is wow, he is so white the sun had to put on sunscreen. He looks like the page in the coloring book you haven’t gotten to yet. Is he partying on that yacht? Or is he haunting it? I will say, though, he does have the skin tone of someone who is very good with technology.” —Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

They will steal our spines to use as radio towers to broadcast our location to Bill Gates (Can't have that)

June 2022

“During the third public hearing by the January 6th House select committee, in which Representative Liz Cheney spoke directly to the at-home audience: ‘Don’t be distracted by politics. This is serious. We cannot let America become a nation of conspiracy theories and thug violence.’ It’s true, because if we do, the reptilians who run the new world order will steal our spines to use as radio towers to broadcast our location to Bill Gates.” —Stephen Colbert

“On Tuesday, the committee heard from the Georgia secretary of state, Brad Raffensperger, whom Trump berated in the aftermath of the 2020 election on an hour-long phone call in which he asked him to overturn the results. ‘So what are we going to do here, folks? I only need 11,000 votes. Give me a break,’ Trump said. That is just pathetic. He’s literally begging them to invent votes for him. It’s like watching an old man try to mooch an extra pancake at the Denny’s – ‘what are we doing here, folks? I only need one more pancake, fellas. And then I got a grand slam. Just flap some jacks on there, give me a break. Give me a break – and the state of Georgia.’” —Stephen Colbert

“There is a new interview from former vice-president Mike Pence, in which he said that after the January 6th attack on the Capitol, he and Trump ‘talked through it’ and then ‘rolled our sleeves up and finished working together’. I don’t buy it. The only way Trump ever rolled his sleeves up was to sell a fake Rolex.” —Seth Meyers

“Mike Pence also said he would always be proud to have served with Trump, ‘because in the end, there is no bond stronger than Stockholm syndrome.’” —Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Let’s just ponder for a moment how evil you need to be to shock someone who grew up with Dick Cheney for a father (F'ing with him)

June 2022

“Let’s recap the first week of public hearings, in which co-chair Liz Cheney explicitly placed the turd of the flies at the center of a plot to destroy democracy. As Cheney told the committee: ‘President Donald Trump’s intention was to remain president of the United States despite the lawful outcome of the 2020 election.’ Let’s just ponder for a moment how evil you need to be to shock someone who grew up with Dick Cheney for a father.” —Samantha Bee

“Look, anyone with a pulse knows that Donald Trump spurred on the insurrection, but it matters that we’re seeing hardcore evidence in the footage and also the testimony of his most trusted advisers. I know the January 6th insurrection was 17 months ago and with a continuous flow of horrifying news, it’s easy to forget just how bad that day was. And more importantly, it’s easy to forget how the person who encouraged it, the person who wants to announce his 2024 bid outside of Ron DeSantis’s house, still needs to be held responsible. It is a travesty. Although it is kinda funny that he might announce outside Ron DeSantis’s house, just to fuck with him.” —Samantha Bee

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Pretty impressive — 76 and he can still get an insurrection (his legal advice doesn’t get any better when he’s sober)

June 2022

“During yesterday’s congressional hearing, it was revealed that Donald Trump Jr.’s fiancée, Kimberly Guilfoyle, was paid $60,000 to speak at the rally before the Capitol attack. Well, technically, $20,000 to speak and then $40,000 to please stop.” —Seth Meyers

“Representative Liz Cheney’s assessment that Trump’s personal lawyer Rudy Giuliani was apparently inebriated when advising the former president on election night. To be fair, his legal advice doesn’t get any better when he’s sober.” —Seth Meyers

“That’s right, today was former President Donald Trump’s 76th birthday. Pretty impressive — 76 and he can still get an insurrection.” —Seth Meyers

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

She’s blind, so he’s got a shot (Take your time — think back)

June 2022

“It’s a bit of a leading question. They followed up by asking, ‘Do you notice anyone that night who was maybe farting while leaking hair dye and ranting in front of a dildo shop? Anyone like that? Could be anyone. Take your time — think back.’” — Stephen Colbert, on Jason Miller’s being asked if anyone was drunk on election night.

“Let me help you out here. There are five levels of intoxication on the Rudy breathalyzer: over the legal limit, rooting around the dumpster for empties, rooting around in his pants in ‘Borat,’ planning coup in a blackout and ‘The Masked Singer.’” — Stephen Colbert

“Today was Episode 2 of the hot new reality show ‘The January 6th Committee Hearings.’ We’re all waiting to find out if the former president gets to go to the fantasy suite with Lady Justice. She’s blind, so he’s got a shot.” — Stephen Colbert

“Episode 1 was a huge hit, because at least 20 million people watched Thursday’s hearing. We were live, OK? That’s the kind of audience usually reserved for ‘Sunday Night Football.’ Makes sense because Thursday’s hearing featured even more guys with brain damage.” — Stephen Colbert

“During the Monday hearing, Liz Cheney said Trump ignored advisers who confirmed the 2020 election was over and instead followed the advice of an apparently inebriated Rudy Giuliani to pursue non-existent claims of election fraud. That raises an interesting question: how many of the former president’s terrible ideas came from an inebriated Rudy Giuliani? Could it be … all of them?” — Stephen Colbert

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

They’re just a group of ordinary citizens wearing bear skin and horns (they’ll throw you right in the goulash)

“The Republican party is having a bit of an internal squabble right now. The party is divided over whether the violent insurrection of January 6 was a violent insurrection or just a lively sightseeing tour of the Capitol. A week ago, the Republican National Committee voted to censure GOP legislators Adam Kinzinger and Liz Cheney for participating in the House inquiry into the insurrection, and in a statement called the attack ‘ordinary citizens engaged in legitimate political discourse’. They’re just a group of ordinary citizens wearing bear skin and horns smearing feces on the wall of the Capitol. Just ordinary citizens.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“In a rebuke of his own party, the Senate minority leader, Mitch McConnell, reaffirmed this week that the attack was ‘a violent insurrection’ aimed at preventing the peaceful transfer of power. Just to show you how far down the crazy hole we’ve gone, we’re now applauding Republicans who are willing to admit that what happened, happened.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“But there’s not just crazy, there’s some dumb going on, too, including deranged comments this week by Representative Marjorie Taylor Greene. Greene likened Congress to a gulag and said Nancy Pelosi deployed ‘gazpacho police’, instead of the Gestapo. If you’ve got cold soup you’d better watch it, because Nancy Pelosi is coming for it. These must be the soup Nazis Seinfeld warned us about so many years ago. And if the gazpacho police get ahold of you they’ll throw you right in the goulash.” —Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/02/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

They said if the election were held today he would actually beat Dolph Lundgren (the first Cheney with an actual exit strategy)

January 2014

"Actor Steven Seagal says that he is considering running for governor of Arizona. It’s looking pretty good. They said if the election were held today he would actually beat Dolph Lundgren." –Jay Leno

"Liz Cheney has decided to pull out of her Senate campaign race in Wyoming — thus making her the first Cheney with an actual exit strategy." –Jay Leno

"According to a new international survey, among Catholics Pope Francis has an approval rating of 88 percent. That is unless he comes out with FrancisCare. Then the whole thing could plummet." –Jay Leno

"There was a nuclear meltdown in North Korea today. But enough about Dennis Rodman." –Jay Leno

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

How many bombshells can Americans take in one day? (I’m pretty sure that coating is deck sealant)

July 2021

“I am tentatively celebrating the breaking news that New York prosecutors have charged the Trump Organization and its chief financial officer, Allen Weisselberg, with a ‘sweeping and audacious illegal payment scheme’ of tax-related crimes. I want to join you in that feeling, but I’ve been hurt too many times. First I fell in love with the Mueller report, then I bounced back with the first impeachment, then I gave love one more chance with the other impeachment, and I just hurt, you know?” —Stephen Colbert

“The 15-count indictment charged the Trump Organization and Weisselberg, who has worked for the family for over 50 years, with a scheme to defraud, grand larceny, criminal tax fraud and falsifying business records, including $1.7m in illegal payments. But all the experts were saying that these charges, unlike the former president, seem kinda thin. Trump also wasn’t personally charged in the filing. Nothing sticks to this guy. I’d call him Teflon Don but I’m pretty sure that coating is deck sealant.” —Stephen Colbert

“Still, this is a moment of reckoning. It’s like the end of The Avengers, when Tony Stark snaps his fingers and destroys Thanos’s … accountant. Will it work? Maybe. Weisselberg’s former daughter-in-law, who likened Trump and his accountant’s relationship to Batman and Robin. They’re a team. They’re not best friends. Hold on, Batman and Robin aren’t best friends?! How many bombshells can Americans take in one day. I don’t understand.” —Stephen Colbert

“We here at the Late Show will stay on this story as it continues to disappoint us. But I do have a glimmer of hope for a sliver of consequences on the January 6 insurrection, as Nancy Pelosi announced an investigation into the attack headed by a ‘select committee’, which really sounds like the store brand. But still good, I love ‘select committee’ lemon cookies.” —Stephen Colbert

“On Thursday, the House speaker named seven prominent Democrats and one Republican, the embattled congresswomen Liz Cheney, to the committee. OK, so the committee has seven Democrats to grill the seditionists, and if that doesn’t work, they have one Cheney to shoot them in the face.” —Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night 

of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

All you have to do is hang a sign outside that says, ‘Just Salad.’ (since they tried to murder Mike Pence)

May 2021

“Wow, I respect Liz Cheney taking a stand against Trump, but it does feel a little less threatening when she’s doing it as she’s being removed from power, you know? It’s got the vibe of a villain falling into a volcano while saying, ‘This isn’t over!’” —Trevor Noah

“You know, you can’t have Republicans going around saying Biden won the election — people might get the right idea.” —Jimmy Kimmel

“Yeah, Republicans haven’t turned on someone this fast since they tried to murder Mike Pence.” —Jimmy Fallon

“After the vote, Liz Cheney said that she doesn’t want Trump to get near the Oval Office ever again. Yeah, it’s not that hard — all you have to do is hang a sign outside that says, ‘Just Salad.’” —Jimmy Fallon

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

I’d grow a beard and dig a spider hole (Blatant or Systemic/They really like guns)

May 2021

“Liz Cheney was ousted via voice vote during a closed-door meeting. So we don’t know exactly what happened, but sources in the room say she made a defiant final speech that drew boos from her colleagues. But to be fair, Matt Gaetz boos any woman not wearing braces.” —Stephen Colbert

“Her principal political patron is a man who was compared to Darth Vader and took it as a compliment. She learned Washington infighting from a man who lived a year with no heartbeat. If I were Kevin McCarthy, I’d grow a beard and dig a spider hole.” —Stephen Colbert

“Liz Cheney’s refusal to dismiss Trump’s role in inciting the 6 January siege on the Capitol angered McCarthy, who insisted after Cheney’s ouster that the GOP remains a ‘big tent party.’ Oh it’s a big tent all right, there’s room for QAnons, Pizzagaters, people afraid Jewish space lasers, everyone’s welcome. Except Liz Cheney. And gay people, and Asian people. And black people. But we’re going to give them a separate but equal tent.” —Stephen Colbert

“They had to get rid of Liz Cheney! She was a loose cannon. They made her turn in her badge and her gun, and her other gun, and her other, other gun. They really like guns.” —Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

in Liz Cheney’s father’s day... (little bits of panda fur or traces of Ivanka handbags)

May 2021

“The GOP’s is purging anyone who dares question the former president, such as Liz Cheney, the third-ranking Republican in the House and staunch conservative now facing calls for resignation after she refused to back Donald Trump’s election fraud lies. Cheney’s detractors include the House minority leader and Trump lackey Kevin McCarthy, who was caught on a hot mic last week saying he’d ‘had it’ with Cheney, the daughter of George W. Bush’s vice-president, Dick Cheney. What has happened to the GOP? Back in Liz Cheney’s father’s day, if you had a problem with a fellow Republican, you didn’t stab them in the back, you shot him in the face on a hunting trip, then you made them go on TV and apologize to you.” —Stephen Colbert

“So now, the only GOP purity test is loyalty to Mayor McTreason. And nowhere is the GOP’s complete retreat from reality worse than their so-called election audit in Maricopa county, Arizona. The county already had two official audits after the 2020 election – both of which revealed exactly zero shenanigans – but Republican state senators authorized a third by a private security firm called Cyber Ninjas, which has zero experience in election audits and is owned by the Trump conspiracy theorist Doug Logan. Because of the two official audits finding no fraud, the cyber ninjas are thinking outside the box and the brain, such as examining ballots using microscopes and ultraviolet light in a hunt for ‘bamboo particles’ as part of a baseless conspiracy that the ballots were planted by China. That’s insane – bamboo literally grows everywhere in the world. If you want to prove the ballots were from China, you’ve got to look for little bits of panda fur or traces of Ivanka handbags.” —Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html 

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”