No word on what the winner gets (He keeps the money)

Jeb Bush’s campaign has a contest now where someone will be flown to Houston to meet him, his dad, and his brother. No word on what the winner gets. –Conan O’Brien

While accepting the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor, Eddie Murphy did a Bill Cosby impression. Murphy’s Cosby impression was so accurate, nine women are suing him. –Conan O’Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

all the other sex addicts thought Weinstein was too creepy (nine women are suing him)

While accepting the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor, Eddie Murphy did a Bill Cosby impression. Murphy’s Cosby impression was so accurate, nine women are suing him. –Conan O’Brien

Harvey Weinstein just finished a week-long stay at a rehab clinic for sex addiction. Apparently he would’ve have stayed longer, but all the other sex addicts thought Weinstein was too creepy. –Conan O’Brien

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Unless it's two chicks (17 wives)

"The chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff recently upset gay activists because he said, 'a homosexual act between two individuals is immoral.' Then the chairman added, 'Unless it's two chicks.'" --Conan O'Brien

"The movie '300' is a setting box office records, but there is a controversy. The country of Iran is reportedly angry over the depiction of the Persian Empire in the movie '300'. Not only that, the Syrian government's upset that Eddie Murphy didn't win an Oscar for 'Dreamgirls.'" --Conan O'Brien

"According to the Chicago Tribune, Senator Obama's great-great-great-great-grandfather and great-great-great-great-grandmother may have owned slaves. It's damage control time. I believe the only way for Barack Obama to get in front of this story is to do the right thing -- the thing so many black leaders are unwilling to do -- apologize for slavery." --Stephen Colbert

"Mitt Romney, who is a Mormon, is reeling from reports that his great-grandfather had fives wives and at least one of his great-great-grandfathers had twelve. That poor bastard had to register at Crate and Barrel 12 times. And that's back when all they sold were crates and barrels. The word 'polygamy', of course, comes from the Greek 'poly' meaning multiple and 'gamy' meaning reasons not to vote for Mitt Romney." --Stephen Colbert

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html “A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

they noticed an unmarked van parked in the shower

I saw that Jay-Z and Beyoncé dressed as the characters from the Eddie Murphy movie “Coming to America.” In fact their "Coming to America" costumes were so good, Donald Trump had them both deported. –Jimmy Fallon

It's being reported that the Jets had their locker room swept for listening devices before their recent game against the New England Patriots. The Jets became suspicious when they noticed an unmarked van parked in the shower. –Jimmy Fallon

On last week's episode of “Inside the NBA,” Shaquille O’Neal claimed that someone recently offered him $50 million to go to the moon. Then Shaq reached up and went, “You mean this little ball of cheese?” –Jimmy Fallon

No word on what the winner gets

Jeb Bush’s campaign has a contest now where someone will be flown to Houston to meet him, his dad, and his brother. No word on what the winner gets. –Conan O’Brien

While accepting the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor, Eddie Murphy did a Bill Cosby impression. Murphy’s Cosby impression was so accurate, nine women are suing him. –Conan O’Brien

Donald Trump is now saying that his immigration policies would have prevented 9/11. Trump is also claiming his hair would have kept the Titanic afloat. –Conan O’Brien