This guy can’t keep his insurrection in his pants anymore (You would be better off dressed as kielbasa)

President Trump, who has already sent National Guard troops to Los Angeles and Washington this year, is now trying to deploy them in Chicago and Portland, Ore., despite resistance from local and state officials who say he’s trying to invent a crisis. He’s sending the Texas National Guard into Chicago, all dressed in camouflage, by the way. I want to say, I know you’re from Texas, guys — camouflage will not help you blend in in Chicago. You would be better off dressed as kielbasa in Chicago.” — Jimmy Kimmel

“Trump is reported to be ‘seriously considering’ invoking the Insurrection Act, which is a law from 1807 that would allow him to use the military to enforce his rules. This guy can’t keep his insurrection in his pants anymore.” — Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2025/04/thats-no-way-to-say-goodbye-new.html 

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Using their connections to get into the Texas National Guard (Not a bad idea to kick off bikini season)

"Last year the U.S. Army missed its recruiting goal. But this year not only did they meet their goal, they exceeded it. They got 80,000 recruits. The bad news is all 80,000 of them used their connections to get into the Texas National Guard." --Jimmy Kimmel

"Saddam Hussein has announced a new hunger strike to protest the shooting death of his lawyer yesterday. Not a bad idea to kick off bikini season." --Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

As a result, most Americans spent all day on hold with computer problems

"After Afghanistan, President Bush flew to India, where he was greeted by 10,000 angry protestors. As a result, most Americans spent all day on hold with computer problems."  --Conan O'Brien

"President Bush made a surprise stop in Afghanistan today on his way to India. He didn't want to stop, but he bought his ticket on Priceline.com" --Jay Leno

"Bush was only in Afghanistan for four hours. That may not sound like much, but it's more time than he spent in the Texas National Guard." --Jay Leno

Albert Einstein, trailblazer, a pioneer (Texas National Guard)

"President Bush left for the G8 Summit today in Russia. The White House says he's going to try and convince other world leaders to develop nuclear power. Apparently, it's working, because so far, Bush has convinced Iran and North Korea." --Conan O'Brien

"Last year the U.S. Army missed it's recruiting goal. But this year not only did they meet their goal, they exceeded it. They got 80,000 recruits. The bad news is all 80,000 of them used their connections to get in the Texas National Guard." --Jimmy Kimmel

"According to a series of just published letters that Albert Einstein sent to his second wife, he had ten mistresses. He would send his wife letters about his mistresses and then ask her for advice. Or as Bill Clinton called him, 'a trailblazer, a pioneer.'" --Jay Leno