Maybe he didn't, maybe he didn't, maybe he didn't, maybe he didn't… Awwww! (El Diablo)

In honor of International Women’s Day, McDonald’s is flipping its golden arches to resemble a W instead of an M. And we can’t even show you what they did over at Hooters. --Seth Meyers

Adult film star Stormy Daniels sued President Trump yesterday, alleging that their nondisclosure agreement is not valid because he never signed it. And that sound you just heard was Melania dumping out her desk drawer, looking for the marriage certificate. "Maybe he didn't, maybe he didn't, maybe he didn't, maybe he didn't… Awwww!" --Seth Meyers

CNN and Telemundo both carried tonight’s debate. So questions were addressed either “for Mr. Trump” or “para El Diablo." –Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2023/12/baby-baby-all-time-when-do-we-want.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

Just scrape it off if it tastes funny (El Diablo/Puma Punku)

Some parents across the country are worried after certain brands of sippy cups have started growing mold inside the mouthpiece valves. While other parents are on their third child. “Just scrape it off if it tastes funny.” –Seth Meyers

President Obama posted on LinkedIn today about his first job scooping ice cream. He’s the first president to post on LinkedIn — other than, of course, Abraham LinkedIn. –Seth Meyers

CNN and Telemundo both carried tonight’s debate. So questions were addressed either “for Mr. Trump” or “para El Diablo." –Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

How 'bout some help here? (She kept referring to lunch period as “Miller time.”)

Do you ever notice that sometimes when Donald Trump gives a press conference he sounds like a 5-year-old telling you what he saw at the zoo. --Seth Meyers

Police in South Carolina charged a substitute teacher last week for allegedly being drunk while in class. Students realized she was drunk after she kept referring to lunch period as “Miller time.” –Seth Meyers

New York lawmakers have proposed a new bill that would make baseball the state's official sport, replacing the current official sport, trying to urinate between two parked cars without getting caught. --Seth Meyers

CNN and Telemundo both carried tonight’s debate. So questions were addressed either “for Mr. Trump” or “para El Diablo." –Seth Meyers

According to a recent survey, 15 percent of Americans have admitted to cooking in the nude. Unfortunately, most of them work at Chipotle. –Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/02/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

JOKES: He won the award for Soldier Least Likely to Report for Duty

Today is Groundhog Day. Punxsutawney Phil came out and saw his shadow, which means Trump is going to start fights with six more countries. –Jimmy Fallon

Trump is causing all kinds of trouble this week. In fact, Israel just had to apologize to Mexico, after their prime minister tweeted support for Trump’s border wall. So not only has Trump failed to solve the Middle East conflict, somehow he’s dragged Mexico in the middle of it. –Jimmy Fallon

White House press secretary Sean Spicer announced that four reporters would receive Skype seats for press briefings rather than being there in person. Spicer said he picked the four reporters at random. Then said: “CNN, BuzzFeed, The New York Times, and Telemundo.” Just random names. –Jimmy Fallon

Just scrape it off if it tastes funny

CNN and Telemundo both carried tonight’s debate. So questions were addressed either “for Mr. Trump” or “para El Diablo." –Seth Meyers

President Obama posted on LinkedIn today about his first job scooping ice cream. He’s the first president to post on LinkedIn — other than, of course, Abraham LinkedIn. –Seth Meyers

Some parents across the country are worried after certain brands of sippy cups have started growing mold inside the mouthpiece valves. While other parents are on their third child. “Just scrape it off if it tastes funny.” –Seth Meyers