Believe me, that's about as much sex as I can handle (Mom, I need to talk to you about birth control)

 

"President Bush met at the White House with Jordan's King Abdullah. Yeah, there was one awkward moment when President Bush asked King Abdullah, 'How is Queen Latifah?'" --Conan O'Brien

"Political observers are pointing out, maybe you've seen this too, that at campaign rallies, John McCain likes to give Sarah Palin a hug, then give his wife a kiss on the cheek. That's the ritual, yeah. When asked about it, McCain said, 'Believe me, that's about as much sex as I can handle.' That's an orgy for him. I went too far." --Conan O'Brien

 

"This is true. In Alaska, a political activist is trying to get Sarah Palin to release over 1,000 emails that she's withholding from public records. She won't release them. Yeah. Apparently, several of the e-mails went unanswered and have the subject line 'Mom, I need to talk to you about birth control.'" --Conan O'Brien

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

 

That's why you have to go to Kuwait to see figure skating (robot to robot)

"Arnold Schwarzenegger got together with Al Gore for a climate change summit. Even though he's a Republican and Al Gore's a Democrat, it's good they could talk robot to robot." --Jay Leno

"President Bush gave a speech urging Congress to reauthorize the No Child Left Behind Act. See, I think the reason President Bush is so adamant about this is, I think he might have been a child left behind himself. Listen carefully to what he says here [on screen: Bush saying, 'Childrens do learn']. Exactly, see that." --Jay Leno

"No gays in Iran. That's why you have to go all the way to Turkey for a facial. That's why you have to go to Jordan to look at drapes. That's why you have to go to Syria to get a decent perm. That's why you have to go to Kuwait to see figure skating." --David Letterman

     

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #books #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

Angry candidates, no. Horny and stupid candidates, yes (How is Queen Latifah?)

"Hillary has got a brand new diamond ring. A brand-new, huge, enormous diamond ring. It's oversized and it's flawed, just like her husband. The last time a Democrat had a stone that big, it was passed by Ted Kennedy." --David Letterman

"President Bush met at the White House with Jordan's King Abdullah. Yeah, there was one awkward moment when President Bush asked King Abdullah, 'How is Queen Latifah?'" --Conan O'Brien

"Ken Mehlman, you ever heard of this guy? He's the head of the Republican national party. He said over the weekend that Hillary Clinton has a lot of anger, and that voters don't usually send angry candidates to the White House. Angry candidates, no.  Horny and stupid candidates, yes." --Jay Leno