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Sunday, April 2, 2017

Connecticut Welcomes You. Birthplace of George W. Bush (We Apologize)



"Obama, what about Louis Farrakhan, leader of the Nation of Islam and infamous anti-Semite. He endorsed your campaign and all you did was denounce it [on screen: HRC saying there is a difference between denouncing and rejecting Farrakhan's support]. Now she's pandering to the SAT prep coach vote. It would be hard enough for Hillary Clinton if she was only fighting Obama, but apparently there are other forces in play [on screen: HRC saying, 'Can I just point out that in the last several debates, I seem to get the first question all the time. And I don't mind, you know, I will be happy to field them. I just find it kind of curious that I keep getting the first questions on all these issues, but I'm happy to answer it']. Yeah, you are curiously happy. I guess the media's conspiring to hear from Hillary first. You know, Hillary, it's not sudden-death overtime." --Jon Stewart

"On the other side of the political fence, Senator Larry Craig of Idaho is in the news again. Not only has he not stepped down from his Senate seat after he plead guilty to disorderly conduct for playing footsie with an undercover police officer in an airport bathroom, but he's actually now looking for summer interns. He's looking for juniors and seniors in college from Idaho, have an interest in politics, and know how to keep their mouth shut. If you're interested, slip your resume under the third stall from the left in the men's room" --Jimmy Kimmel



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