We’ll just be over here – with the engines running in case things go south

There are now less than 100 days left until the presidential election. Or you could say, there are now less than 100 days left, period. –Jimmy Fallon

I saw that Apple CEO Tim Cook will hold a fundraiser later this month for Hillary Clinton. He had a long list of terms and conditions for the event, but Hillary just said “Agree!” without really reading them. –Jimmy Fallon

The summer Olympics start this Friday, and I read that the organizing committee will stay aboard a docked cruise ship called “The Getaway,” which will act as a floating hotel. 'Cuz nothing makes you feel safer about the Olympics than the organizers staying in a getaway boat. “You kids have fun! We’ll just be over here – with the engines running in case things go south.” –Jimmy Fallon