"In an effort to make
the Bush environmental record look good, Interior Secretary Gale Norton
announced that under the Bush administration, there are now more wetlands than
any time since 1954. Well yeah, if you count New Orleans." --Jay Leno
"The deputy secretary
for the Department of Homeland Security was arrested after he tried to seduce a
14-year-old girl online, who was actually an undercover detective. I think the
terror alert has been raised to creepy. Homeland Security? We need home room
security. This is the most embarrassing thing to happen to the Bush
administration -- today." --Jay Leno
"This is why
Republicans can't have sex scandals. They're just too creepy. The Democrats,
they've got hookers, mistresses, interns -- not girl scouts!" --Jay Leno
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