"The Pentagon
admitted it's been spying on gay groups. The Pentagon also admitted that since
it's started spying on gay groups, it's been having some weird feelings."
--Conan O'Brien
"Did you see that guy
on the news who got arrested for jumping the fence and running toward the White
House. Luckily, it was pretty easy for the cops to catch him. The guy stood out
like a sore thumb. Right now, everyone in Washington is running away from President
Bush." --Jay Leno
"Outspoken actor Alec
Baldwin told Elle magazine that he's so desperate for a Democrat to be the next
president that he would go a month without sex if it meant a Democrat would win
the White House. And today Bill Clinton called him a fanatic, a lunatic, part
of that kook fringe left. He must be stopped." --Jay Leno
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