I've always heard that if you pardon yourself too much you’ll go blind (When did 'Love It, or Leave It' become racist?)

Today Donald Trump tweeted: “As has been stated by numerous legal scholars, I have the absolute right to pardon myself, but why would I do that when I have done nothing wrong?” If you’re asking a bunch of legal scholars if you can pardon yourself in the event you’re found guilty of something, I’m going to say, you are probably guilty. Also, if he does this, this would definitely be the first time that Trump has ever used the phrase “Pardon me.” But he needs to be careful, because I’m no legal scholar, but I've always heard that if you pardon yourself too much you’ll go blind. --James Corden

A new restaurant has opened in Boston where all the food is cooked by robots. The restaurant was started by a group of engineers from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. A robot that can cook a meal. Is this a new thing? Isn't this just a microwave? I’m pretty sure I had a robot make me a frozen burrito last night. --James Corden

Government officials confirmed this afternoon that a person of interest in the FBI's Russia investigation is Trump's son-in-law, Jared Kushner. This comes at a bad time, because the Trump administration has just released its budget. Now they must be like, “Oh, we forgot to set aside bail money.” –James Corden

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/03/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”