"Pakistan
is opening an amusement park and a zoo in the same town where the raid on Osama
Bin Laden took place. The zoo is pretty cool, but I've heard you won't be able
to see the seals until it's too late." –Jimmy Fallon
"This
is kind of disturbing. The Justice Department has concluded that the president
can order drone strikes on American citizens. And today, Rush Limbaugh came out
in favor of Obamacare." –Jay Leno
"Some Democrats in Congress are now trying to change the
marijuana laws, making it legal so it can be taxed and increase revenue. Is
that what the government's come down to now? We're selling drugs to pay off our
debts? When did Uncle Sam become Scarface?" –Jay Leno
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