"The Bush
administration reads the poll numbers, they know most Americans think their
policies are failing, so they've responded by changing the person who tells us
those policies. It's quite a bold move. Every house cleaning starts by
replacing the doormat." --Daily Show correspondent Ed Helms
"During a Pentagon
briefing, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld said we're making progress and
we're very close to capturing some high ranking officials. Unfortunately they are
all retired U.S. generals." --Jay Leno
"Chinese President Hu Jintao will also be visiting the
White House. China's president meets America's president. President Hu meets
President Huh." --Jay Leno
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