Why don't you slip into something a little more con carni? (I'll just take the groping)

August 2011

"They say we avoided economic disaster. So now we're $16 trillion in debt. That's not 'economic disaster?'" –David Letterman

"Vice President Joe Biden referred to the Tea Party as 'terrorists.' This is a real slap in the face — to terrorists." –David Letterman

"A woman here in New York was arrested for pouring chili on $700 worth of Victoria's Secret underwear. Or as Rush Limbaugh calls that, foreplay. 'Why don't you slip into something a little more con carni?'" –Jimmy Fallon

"The TSA has a new program where agents have in-depth conversations with passengers to detect suspicious behavior. Or as most people put it, 'You know what, I'll just take the groping.'" –Jimmy Fallon
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"Go ahead, Tea Party Congress people, put on your tri-corner hats, play your fifes, and dance the minuet. Tea party like it's 1799." –Jon Stewart

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html

“A magisterial collection. An emotional roller coaster. Soon to be a cult classic. 

A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night On Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”

On the downside, he’s now banned from Victoria’s Secret (NRA Baby Crib)

Google just released a pair of headphones that can translate 40 languages instantly. They say it’s a great way to travel to a new country and find out everyone’s making fun of you. –Jimmy Fallon

A man from Italy just set a Guinness World Record by putting on 13 pairs of underwear in 30 seconds. On the downside, he’s now banned from Victoria’s Secret. –Jimmy Fallon

    

http://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2016/06/john-hulse-collected-poems-1985-2015.html #books #Bernie2020 #repealreplacerepublicans

OK, thanks for coming over.

President Obama reportedly met Hillary Clinton yesterday for a secret lunch at the White House. And then when lunch ended, Hillary said, “OK, thanks for coming over.” –Seth Meyers

The Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show aired tonight on CBS. Normally, you’d have to watch the Food Network to see that many oily ribs. –Seth Meyers

Former California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger said yesterday that he will become a “part-time vegetarian” to cut down his carbon footprint. If you’re wondering what a part-time vegetarian is, it’s someone who eats meat. –Seth Meyers

How many would rather vote for the straw?

"A woman here in New York was arrested for pouring chili on $700 worth of Victoria's Secret underwear. Or as Rush Limbaugh calls that, foreplay. 'Why don't you slip into something a little more con carni?'" –Jimmy Fallon



"Just 10 days until the big Iowa Republican presidential straw poll. How many think Mitt Romney will win the straw poll? How many think Michele Bachmann will win? How many would rather vote for the straw?" –Jay Leno 

"According to a new poll, voters described the way Congress behaved during the debt debate as 'disgusting, stupid, and ridiculous.' They would have also accepted 'gutless and cowardly.'" –David Letterman