It’s a Dr. Seuss-themed gay wedding cake (it’s smart enough to go from sofa to brunch)

March 2021

“I get it — after a year of quarantine, nothing fits anymore. They should have put that ship into their stretchy canal. You know, the one that looks like denim, but gives, and it’s smart enough to go from sofa to brunch.” —Stephen Colbert

“I’ll give you a sense of how huge these container ships are: This one is as long as New York’s Empire State Building is tall. Well, there’s your problem. You should have sailed it through upright.” —Stephen Colbert

“In the wake of the Boulder and Atlanta shootings, many have once again called on Congress to pass gun safety legislation, while others are calling on the NRA to pass the money bucket. Republicans are trying the same old cynical of switching the subject away from guns to things like mental health or video games or ‘look over there! It’s a Dr. Seuss-themed gay wedding cake for the marriage of Pepé Le Pew and Mr Potato Head!’” —Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html

“A poet that belongs with the Masters. A magisterial collection. A combination of 

Bukowski’s The Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.” 

 

they are the things that have become unimaginable (works just fine)

March 2021

“I heard an anchor this morning call the events in Boulder ‘unimaginable.’ That’s probably a word we can retire. When something happens three or four times a week, it is no longer unimaginable. Sadly, we’re at a place where common sense gun laws and political action are the things — they are the things that have become unimaginable.” —Seth Meyers

“We could also stop using ‘shooter.’ It makes these people sound like hobbyists, which is exactly the [expletive] rationale that keeps those kinds of weapons flowing. ‘Killer’ or ‘murderer’ works just fine.” —Seth Meyers

“And of course, we can do away with ‘thoughts and prayers.’ If the best you can muster in response to this kind of horror is to say words inside your own head and nothing more, best to look around, find someone or some organization that’s taking action, and help them instead.” —Seth Meyers

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html

“A poet that belongs with the Masters. A magisterial collection. A combination of 

Bukowski’s The Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.” 

 

whose stupid idea was that? Thanks, Einstein (putting all of us under house arrest)

May 2012

“Now due, apparently, to pandemic shutdowns, it has been a year since there has been a large-scale shooting in a public place. Now we’ve had two in the last week: Boulder and Atlanta. Evidently, the only solution for America’s gun violence is putting all of us under house arrest.” —Stephen Colbert

“The responses from gun apologists, of course, have been predictable. The Colorado State Shooting Association released this statement: ‘There will be a time for the debate on gun laws. There will be a time for a conversation on how this could have been prevented. But today is not the time.’ Why not? That’s what they say every time this happens, and that’s what I say about what they say every time they say it every time it happens. Even the idea of it being in a ‘groundhog’ situation is itself a ‘groundhog’ situation. Remember, Einstein said, ‘The definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results. Also, same-day gun purchases — whose stupid idea was that? Thanks, Einstein.” —Stephen Colbert

“Senator John Kennedy of Louisiana, who during a congressional hearing attempted to steer the subject from gun control to young people who drink and drive. OK, I’ll take that deal. Let’s regulate guns the way we regulate alcohol and cars. You got to be 21, you got to pass a test to get a license, you got to have a registration and insurance for your gun. If you move to a new state, you got to do the whole damn thing all over again. And you can’t go out loaded.” —Stephen Colbert

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2021/02/a-magisterial-collection.html

“A poet that belongs with the Masters. A magisterial collection. A combination of 

Bukowski’s The Last Night of the Earth and Orwell’s 1984.”