He finished with a touchdown, 12 catches, 179 yards, and 35 friendship bracelets (we are free to re-write them)

“There are now eight candidates for speaker — seven white men and one Black man, or as Republicans call it, a very diverse slate of choices. It’s like the reunion of a college basketball team from 1955, you know?” —Jimmy Kimmel

“Yeah, I guess it works, because Travis Kelce had his best game of the season yesterday. He finished with a touchdown, 12 catches, 179 yards, and 35 friendship bracelets, so, what a haul.” — Jimmy Kimmel

I wonder if Travis Kelce knows that if he ever tries to end his relationship with Taylor Swift, he’s dead. They’ll kill him. It’s the dating equivalent of asking the mafia to go in on a restaurant with you. —Jimmy Kimmel

https://idiocracy23.blogspot.com/2022/08/1001-ways-to-make-america-great-and.html

“A magisterial collection. A combination of Bukowski’s Last Night of the Earth 

and Orwell’s 1984.”